


All Seeing, All Seer

by ElliotCarter



Category: Fable (Video Games), Fable 2 (Video Game)
Genre: Cannon is TOTALLY OUT, Dubious Ethics, Dubious Morality, Fable 2 - Freeform, First work don't know how to tag, Hard start turning into a slow up and down until happy ending fuck sad endings, Hints at Stockholm Syndrome that turns into mutual respect eventually, I will mark chapters with warnings but if you need anything tagged please let me know, Issues with reentering society, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Stalking, Suicidal and intrusive thoughts, Trust Issues, Violence, eventual romance and smut lol, kinda slow burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-10
Updated: 2019-12-09
Packaged: 2020-04-24 09:07:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 11
Words: 42,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19170127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElliotCarter/pseuds/ElliotCarter
Summary: Helix is thrown into the world of Fable Two, under dire circumstances. He befriends Sparrow just after Rose's death. They grow up together, and Helix attempts to learn how to cast. Helix is staying at Bright Wood Tower for the night, waiting for Garth to come back so that he can continue to try and train him to use magic. Instead, he is founded by the Commandant of Lucien's army, and to his utter confusion, stalked relentlessly.





	1. The Pursuit Begins

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, all! Thank you for taking the time to read this. I have never posted any of my writing anywhere so I am hopeful at least one person will like it. I've always loved the Commandant for a long time and I wanted to write something where I felt he was close to in character as I could get while he still was infatuated with my character. Things might not make exact sense but I will explain them later. Maybe, haaaa.  
> The formanting is not correct so I'll have to play with it.  
> This is definitely a non-canonical approach and totally self indulgent, haha. But never the less, I hope you enjoy.

Humming cut through the dewy, cool air at the top of Bright Wood tower. Helix wondered if he should contact Giles as he flipped the page of the book on how to use and control Will power. Ask him how exterminating the Bandits was going. He knew that his father was more than capable, fearsome and his reputation was nothing but the truth. But; he always was concerned when the old guard took matters into his own iron fists. Helix let his eyes drift off the page and down to his gauntlet with the connected condensed air powered blade, a pile bunker. The massive feat of engineering that took him three months of solid day in, day out work. As did all his other guns, or more so. He felt good about letting his father borrow them, however. He didn't want Giles going head long into a tough fight without reliable weapons. His old blunderbuss was fine for a single shot, but far to slow and cumbersome for him now. Helix was unbelievably proud of his creations. They were like no other and he only had his alien origins to blame. The thought of Giles being so proud that he trusted the guns to stand up in a brawl, though? That was the most satisfying thing Helix had ever come across in his depressing life. His father, proud? He smiled, drifting his eyes back to the blurry words on the page. They came into sharp focus after a few quick blinks. Helix turned to grab a book mark, pausing in his mild tune. That sound, it wasn't him. Quietly, he pressed his back to the wall, inching over and glancing out into Bright Wood's glory. The trees were covered in a gentle morning mist, droplets collected and slipped off the leaves quietly. The air had a bite to it, the wind carrying the nipping cool frost. It had rained heavily last night and in the quiet he could hear the river at the back of the tower, gushing over the rocks. He drew his eyes up farther, toward the road in front of the tower. He noticed many inky black shadows moving toward the tower with haste.  


They contrasted sharply against the benign pearl mist that began to reflect soft orange that shimmered against the wet vegetation. Lucien's men. There was no other possibility. Not in that sheer amount of numbers, nor with how they all looked the same. Helix's eyes finally hit what he most feared. A sharp, angular shadow hovered over the second floor landing. His teeth began grinding and his hands curled shut to spring the gauntlets. His pile bunker hissing softly as it pierced the canister and loaded itself. The Great Shard spun clockwise, ever so slow and gentle. The will output making it hum with power that Helix couldn't understand. He pressed his back to the sweating, cold wall in trepidation. What was he going to do? What could he do? If that thing was here, Lucien's army was walking down that road, and the Commandant would be close behind. He swallowed, breathing in softly, and exhaling his doubts. Just like Giles taught him. He always got out of everything he got into, and so could Helix. He was always so proud of him. Helix decided then and there that he would see his father again, and he would thank him profusely for the love he showed him. Helix would tell him he loved him again, over and over.  
'I'm in trouble.' He thought over the seal that connected him to Blade, Hammer, and Garth.  
'Why?' Hammer asked. 'Are you alright? Do you need me?'  
'The Great Shard is here.'  
'Helix, run.' Garth hissed. 'Run and do not look back. Don't fight, just get away from that thing.'  
'I get that.' Helix thought, jumping as it began supposedly dropping troops. 'I just wanted to say that I'm sorry and I love you guys... Just in case.'  
'Helix! Don't joke like that!' Hammer hissed over the bond. Helix sealed it off, working his lip with his teeth. He jerked his head over, watching two grunts bound up the stairs. Helix took the surprise he had over them, cross the room in a few swift steps and leaped into a harsh tail spin. He dislocated his jaw with his foot, sending him and his pal crashing back down the stairs like bowling pins. Strike, but that's going to alert everyone else. Helix ran down the stairs, meeting four standing guards, not worrying about the two on the ground whimpering. He jumped passed one that swung his sword at him, ducking and cracking his elbow back against the grunt's face that tried to make a grab at him. He grasped his arm from his flailing and tugged him around, cracking the pile bunker into his sternum and sending the other three packing in a panic to dodge their compatriot's flying body. Helix followed the sailing man like a shield. He jumped onto the railing, sliding down the stairs and sprinting out of the building. He drew into a slide that almost caused him to crash backwards, spraying the standing water on the marble toward the ten men gathered at the base of the tower where Helix was now. There was no one behind him toward the back of the tower yet, but he was sure there would be soon. He was astonished at the organization of the men. He heard nothing but the foolish and stupid tried the crucible, did the Commandant train them so well? Or did he beat it into them so savagely that they faked the tactics?  
More men were flooding down the road with a towering mass striding ever closer with a massive gait. He was at the center of the men marching and jogging up towards the place Helix called home. He watched his breath turn to vapor, slipping up his face as he watched with utter dismay as he got clearer, and clearer. The Commandant was enormous, his demeanor was nothing but kill and conqueror. Helix backed up a few steps. He couldn't go forward, not without using every bit of his gauntlet ammo and his pile bunker until it over heated. Something told him he would never defeat the Commandant anyway. He had a stark, uncomfortable delusion that even Blade would fall to him, no matter the training he partook in. He locked eyes with one of the grunts in front of him, finally. He was a bit better dressed, with a nicer sword. A Lieutenant? Something other than an officer, or a grunt.  
“You don't look like Garth.” Helix's eyes flicked over to the Commandant who motioned to the side of the tower, obviously commanding his men. He could hear the din of his voice but he couldn't make out what he was saying. It was cutting through the mist like an air raid siren. Take shelter, Helix. Run.  
“No. I'm not.”  
“I'm Derek Mays.” He waited. Like Helix would tell him his name. Helix glanced over once more, watching the Commandant's foot crack onto the the first stone step. His fancy boots made a pleasing clip against the marble. Helix would be happy to listen to it if he didn't fear the person that had them on. He probably took three steps at a time. Helix needed to leave. He took a step back. He felt tethered to the spot. As though something had tied him down to a concrete block and dropped him into a boiling lake. “W-Wait-” Helix looked at Derek. “Let's talk, kid. If you run-”  
“Where is Garth?” Helix felt his hair stand on end, cowering back a few more paces as the Commandant stepped up to the landing, the wind caught his heavy jacket and caused it to billow. The Commandant stared down at Derek for a long, tense moment. His voice was rich, full of gravel and demand, a resounding baritone with fierce annunciation. He towered over Derek, even. And Helix swore that Derek was just as big as Blade.  
“Don't know. Ask him.” Helix slipped his foot back slowly, feeling a few tiny stones roll against the sole of his shoe. He looked up the Commandant, noticing the sharp well cared for buckles with no rust on his boots. They were well cared for, polished and sealed from the rain. His jacket broke into four different slits around his legs as it hugged tight to his stomach and chest, the details to the jacket far more simple than he remembered. Only four diamond shaped metal squares on his chest, the jacket defining his arms that looked well toned from using the massive, beautiful claymore on his right side. He didn't have her in a sheath, the blade a wide and long wonder with swirling designs in the metal, and dip in the blade toward the tip on the underside. Helix flicked his eyes up the rest of the way. Staring at the shards that impaled his head, wondering deeply how much that hurt and how he survived. Helix's eyes finally shifted to meet the Commandant's predatory gaze. He swallowed, his heart pounding so hard it was making his chest and throat numb. He wanted to scream, but nothing worked on him anymore. He could feel the gauntlet on his left hand clicking from his shaking. Every bit of Helix told him he was in grave danger, he was standing in front of the face of death. He flicked his eyes down the Commandant's hand. It slowly drew away from his sword hilt, snaking down to his side like he was sneaky. Helix's eyes narrowed slightly, looking up at him again. The way he was looking at him sent a chill ripping down his spine. Why was he looking at him like that? He hadn't killed any of his men yet, and he was just trying to get away.  
Helix placed his foot back fully, sliding the other back in an awkward skipping step. The Commandant followed him immediately, his head tipping to the side as if he was wondering if he was following something truly there. Every single alarm that was ringing in Helix's head intensified, watching the Commandant's fists curl, then uncurl. He stepped toward Helix again. He lunged at him, closing the distance rather impressively as his colossal hand tried to encompass his right bicep. Helix stumbled back, yanking his arm toward his chest to get away from him. His long black sleeve caught on his talons and shredded part of the shirt loudly in the silence. Helix clambered back, landing back on his left hand and whipping around, a short cry leaving him that was shrill and full of terror. He scrambled across the ground as the Commandant dove for him a second time, his claws hissing across the ground as he barely missed Helix's ankle. He bolted into sprinting, glancing back in hopes that he would give up, or Helix would be far to fast for him to handle. A few grunts rushed after him now, too. That stare, what was that? The emotions held behind that look was something Helix wasn't sure he had seen before. Never directed toward him at the very least. He watched him step after him, dropping his arm into a swing and launching after him, the stone underfoot shattering under his wake. He watched as the Commandant cleaved his claws into a grunts face, flooring him out of his way and sending drops of blood flinging in every direction. Helix snapped to look forward, his breathing rivaling hyperventilation. Reverence, worship, desire- No. A need. Helix could feel whatever it was, despite his predictions, boring into his back as he slid across the wet dirt. A group of grunts pulled their swords to meet him. He looked for anything that would help him, snapping his head up and to the right at the wall between here, and the path down toward the bridge. It was probably twelve foot high of smooth marble. Helix jumped up a jagged rock, wall running up it as he grasped the top, swinging his legs up smoothly as he flipped himself over the other side. The Commandant look up at him, something like being impressed. Helix dropped down the other side, shocked with the high fall. He crashed into a haphazard roll and held his shoulder as he used the momentum to spring onto his feet. He looked forward, shaking out his head as his sticky hair clung to his jaw and neck. He would have to fight through the five men on the bridge but he had a good head start on- He jumped, whipping around from a loud thud just behind him. The Commandant stood up, locking eyes with him.  
“𝘕𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘮𝘦.” Helix stepped back, trying to grab Jail Breaker. His fingers bumped a grenade. They hadn't done anything wrong, most of them. They all just wanted a job, money to help their families, families that would never see them again. Helix never wanted to hurt anyone, no less groomed and tortured men forced to fight with collars searing their throats, but... Helix didn't want to kill them, but he couldn't just toss the grenade at the Commandant, he wouldn't survive either. Helix pulled it off his belt and bit the pin, throwing the grenade at a guy who caught it like a sick game of catch. Helix wanted to apologize, but he knew better. He dropped into a crouch behind a stone and held his head. He knew the Commandant was smart, if he saw Helix duck like that- He was right, the Commandant leaped back, ducking behind a stone pillar about three yards away. The resounding crack haunted Helix. No one was screaming, signifying five lives lost in an instant, all because of him. Because he was scared of the Commandant and didn't want to fight him. Helix leaped up, turning the corner and sprinting toward the bridge. He watched it crumble and shatter, large pieces falling into the raging river below. The stone was no longer that soft gray, but spattered with blood and innards. Helix nearly kicked half of a man's skull still filled with a chunk of brain. He blinked away tears hindering his vision and swallowed over and over to fight down bile. Helix panted loudly, grasping another grenade. Helix pulled the pin and dropped it, leaping over the large gap in the bridge. He cracked into the edge, holding tightly as he could feel his feet and legs get splashed by the fast moving water. He flinched as the explosive went off, looking down... Don't let go, get up, get up, get up. He pulled himself up quickly, crawling forward a few steps and standing. The Commandant was jogging toward the bridge. Helix pulled his last two grenades, pulling the pin on one, chucking it right at the Commandant,  
“STOP FOLLOWING ME!” Helix shouted, watching it blow right in front of him. Helix kept his thumb on the pin of the other one, watching the smoke blow away. He reeled in horror as the Commandant dropped his arms from defending his face. As he shifted the shrapnel fell from his jacket, clinking and ringing as it hit the stone. It sounded just like someone dumped a container of nails onto concrete. Helix popped the pin and dropped it, turning and sprinting away. He skid against the ground with a bark of pain, shredding his shirt more and his soaking himself in a puddle he slid into. The grenade rocked everything near him. Helix glanced back, thankful to see him looking at the bridge desperately. He couldn't get over it and it seemed he forgot his own will powers just for a moment. Helix scrambled up, shocked when he caught his eyes again. He looked desperate, upset, his fists curled tightly-  
“You cannot hide, little one!” He howled, as Helix turned, fleeing with purpose.  
“Holy shit.” Helix rasped, 'Dad, I'm coming your way and were going to Bower Stone. No excuses. Be ready.'  
'I'm getting ready now, then.'  
'Garth, Blade, Hammer. I got away. I don't know why but the Commandant has an... Interest in me. I didn't kill any of his men at that point and I was just trying to get away. I don't know what he wants.'  
'He might think you a hero.' Garth admitted.  
'I didn't have my guns on me. And I'm not the hero of strength, they know that she is a girl.'  
'Get out of there, Helix. We can talk later.' He wanted to sob at Blades dismissal. He wanted to know. He wanted them to care, he wanted them to panic too. Why? Why was the Commandant so keen on him? It made no sense. Sure, Helix put down the men in front of him- six of them. But that wasn't really much. That wasn't hero level. He didn't sense anything, because he didn't even notice Helix until Derek pointed him out. But the moment he looked at him, something clicked in his head and he couldn't let him go.  
'Garth, does the Commandant have a thing for people that look a certain way?' He asked.  
'Not to my knowledge, Helix. Why?'  
'He looked at me and just, everything on him changed. It was like he knew me.' Helix slid down to the farm, gathering Giles and kick starting his bike. The motor was a comfort, but it just wasn't enough. He wanted more. He wanted to sit on Giles' lap and never, ever see Albion again.  
'He couldn't. He's been how he is since Blade was eight, you were what?'  
'Five.'  
'You would have known him just by looks.' Helix worked his lip with his teeth as he raced toward Bower Stone with Giles holding onto his back. He was trying to speak over the din of the motor but Helix wouldn't have been able to hear him anyway. Not right now.  
'I'm scared.' Helix admitted. 'He wanted my blood, and he wanted it so bad.'  
'Helix, are you sure he was trying to kill you?'  
'I think he was trying to get a hand on me, but I just- I ran. He had a guard that was friendly enough to talk, but he- He wasn't. And I didn't want to find out if he was just going to grab me or not.'  
'He's aggressive and dominating even when just on a capture mission. As I said, he probably thinks you are a hero.'  
'I'm scared.'  
'I know, Helix.' Garth whispered over the bond. 'I know.' He nodded a few times,  
'I'll see you guys in a while.'  
'Alright, Helix.'


	2. Serenity, Fleating

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, a taste of how I write Giles, and how wonderful of a father I feel like he is from just the short time you spend with him in the game. Also, yeah, I kind of screw around with Aurora in a non-canonical way. Like I said, cannon is out the window mostly, ha. I've got one more chapter premade before I have to work on it. Enjoy!

Helix sat down next to his father, placing a cup of coffee in front of him, a splash of creamer, two tablespoons of sugar. A dark caramel color, but not black, not soft. He always insisted he would get it but Helix just thought it was a kind thing, a small sign of how much he loved his father. Giles would joke now that Helix made it better than him. He felt pride in such a small, laughable thing. He looked up at him, his gray and black hair pulled back into a smooth pony tail and cascaded over his shoulder. His sable skin deep against the white tank top, stained with dirt and grass. His hand slipped into the mugs' handle, as he hummed lowly. His hands where strong from working the farm, thick short, calloused fingers.

“A perfect color, Helix. Thank you, love.” His voice was low and sweet, Helix told him over and over he should sing for a living now. He always laughed at him. Maybe that's why he told him so much. He loved his father's belly laugh. He loved making him happy. Helix looked up into his face.

“Dad.” He said softly. The pools of amber looked toward him, shining in the sunlight that streamed through the window. He smiled at Helix, his crows feet deep and strong. He had check marks under his eyes too, that looked like tick tack toe boards. Helix adored all his wrinkles, he always told him that he was upset that he didn't get the looks in the family. Giles always found that humorous, telling him if he had it would have been from his wife. Helix always loved the way he spoke of her, she was such a deep part of him. He wanted to experience that type of love someday. His mouth curled into a smile, never a grin.

“Yes, love?”

“Mina leeban swi.” Auroran, I love you. Giles' wife spoke it. Helix learned it from Kartheus. It was something that drew them even closer when Giles' wife and child were slaughtered by Ripper, a bandit leader. Helix thought at first that he took him under his wing just because he wanted a son. That he needed a replacement. He wasn't about to complain, but no. Giles stuck to him, just as Helix clung to him. And it became a real relationship where Helix wasn't always throwing everything he had into it to keep it alive. Giles-

“Mina leeban swi dut.” Loved him. The way he smiled when Helix told him he loved him, he just looked so proud. Helix jumped a little when Giles' slipped his fingers under his and held Helix's hand gently, his thumb running over his knuckles. “You look very lost.” Concern began to cross his face. Helix looked at the table, then back up to his dad.

“Dad, I am... In very deep.”

“What do you mean?”

“In Lucien's army there is a Commandant. He is incredibly dangerous, he's good at what he does, and... He is after me. I don't know why.” Helix avoided his gaze. “Blade told me that I can handle myself. Garth told me that he cannot help me in fear of being captured. And Hammer, she wants to help, but I know that she is to inexperienced and would be captured, too.” Helix finally looked at him. “I need you to renounce me for now.” Giles tensed, holding his hand tight.

“Helix-” It was sharp,

“Please. Listen to me.” Helix soothed. Giles silenced himself, for now. “Albion's people don't shut up. They need to for this. You must renounce me, and tell them to never speak of me when you are around. You have to distance yourself from me in every single way. If he finds you, I have no idea what he will do. If he ever looked at you wrong, I would never forgive myself.” Helix looked down again, shaking his head and fighting tears. “Dad, you are the only person in my corner right now. You aren't cowering from me because of him. But I have to isolate or he will massacre everything between he and I until I have nothing, and I give up. I can't let one of those things be you. You've done nothing but nurture and adore me. If I paid you back with torture, and death, my mind would just fucking shatter.” Helix looked up at him, deep in his eyes Hell sat. “Father, I love you so much.” Tears broke from his eyes, splattering onto the table. “I don't want to do this, but I fear if I don't, he will find you and Avo knows what happens next. Please. I don't ask for much.”

“Helix. Eli. Stayer.” Helix swallowed. As much as his father loved him, he had a vicious temper. “How dare you ask me to abandon you when no one else will come to help you. I am your father-”

“And that's why you have to!”

“Do not interrupt me!” Giles hissed at him. Helix flinched, looking rather sad. Giles took a breath, lifting his hand and kissing the knuckles. “Helix, I would die for you. I would be tortured. I suppose this is the difference between me and your little friends. I am an old guard, for Avo's sake. Some man in a higher position won't scare me.” Helix shook his head.

“Father, he is...” Helix thought for a moment. “He is fear personified.” Helix was distant. “Grenades didn't even dent him. I don't know what his jacket is made out of but it stopped the grenades shrapnel, it's gotta be like Kevlar. Might even have some type of augmentation. I have no idea, all I know is it's body armor.” Giles' face contorted.

“And your friends will not help you!?” He rasped, laughing. Mirthless and full of disgust. “What do they expect you to do?!”

“Get captured, and die.”

“No! No, I will not forsake you in a time like this.”

“Father, he will kill you-”

“And you will let him kill you?” He barked back. “You and your ever loving for everyone else! You have no self preservation, Helix! None! And you wish for me to sit here, _your father_ , and watch you kill yourself for people who will not even give you some time? NO!” He barked. Helix flinched down, his leg jumping quickly.

“I was only loved when I had no self preservation.” Helix rasped. “Can't you give me a break?”

“No. It is time these things were said, Helix. This is enough.” Helix looked up at him. “You don't deserve this.” It rung in Helix's head. He didn't. He didn't deserve this, this shouldn't be happening, it couldn't be. Could it? He looked back up at his father. “This is foolish, completely and utterly ridiculous. And I am willing to sell the farm and move to Aurora to get away from this... Commandant.”

“No!” Helix near cried. “That farm is yours, and I'm not taking it from you. I will not be a _burden!_ ”

“God **DAMN IT** , Helix!” He slammed his fist on the table, making Helix scamper back, eyes wide. “You are not a burden, you are in real, tangible danger! No piece of land is worth your life! It is not even worth your paranoia to me!” Helix was silent for a long moment. “Fuck this place, fuck those people that state they are your friends and leave you at this mans feet! We can start fresh, we both speak Auroran, and that buffoon will never guess we went there. Fuck the army, fuck Blade's death wish! He can die, but he will not take my child from me!” Giles hit his own chest lightly. “I won't let you do this. Not without a fight. You are done trying to die for nothing.” Start new, make real friends, a life with Giles that focused on their relationship and not when he needed to head Blade's beck and call. “I don't know how fast I can sell the farm, but I will check how much it takes to get to Aurora-”

“I have a lot of money, dad. Let me-”

“I must sell the farm, no matter what.” Giles stated. “I know you have money, but let me try and give you something _you_ deserve. You just need to keep your head down. I know you're smart enough to avoid him.” Helix wondered if he was, but if he could, the pay out would be amazing. A new life.

“Yes.” Helix whispered, looking at him. “Yes.”

“There we go, that's my boy.” Helix huffed as he hugged him tightly, curling into his father. Giles wasn't much bigger than him, five foot eight at the most, but he felt so safe.

“Mina leeban swi, Mina leeban swi.” Helix rasped, as he rocked him gently.

“Leeban, cere swia wasa.” Love, rest your head. Helix leaned on him fully, unable to stop his sobs now. Someone who cared, someone who panicked like he has. Someone that offered a solution that will work! Someone who loved him. Again, he begged anyone listening, don't take my father away. Please, for the love of everything holy, keep him safe. Kill me, take me instead, but leave my father alone.

 _ **Please**_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three hits and two kudos? Are you for f u c k I n g real? I NEVER thought anyone would even give this the time of day. Thank you guys, thank you thank you thank you.


	3. Too Close, No Comfort

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good guy Derek makes his first debut! You also get to hear the Commandant talk about how he perceives Helix, and his 'hunt.'   
> Gotta work on the next chapter, yay.

Days passed, two, but they felt so long and as if he had nothing to do. Helix was wandering in Bower Stone but he spotted a large number of black jacketed men, and dove back behind the bar he came from. Helix glanced out from behind the Cow And Corset. He watched Lucien's men scatter around. He got lucky, incredibly lucky, as Derek began to walk passed. Even though the difference between Helix and Derek was large, Helix jumped up and grasped his jacket, pulling him around behind the bar. He choked him enough with the fabric to keep him from yelling. Helix tossed him toward the wall and pulled his magnum.

“Don't.” Helix whispered, waiting for anyone to try and find him for a moment. “Derek.”

“Hey, kid.” He replied, not seeming bothered by the massive gun aimed at him, rubbing his throat. Now that Helix wasn't fully focused on the Commandant's impending arrival, Helix noticed Derek. He was a big man, brawny and tall. His hair was a cocoa color, long enough to reach his shoulders. His face wasn't narrow, but his cheekbones were strong and his nose was sharp and thin. His eyes spelled safety, a deep forest green with hints of brown. He seemed to sport a grin most of the time but it wasn't malevolent, it was more along the lines of excitement. But right now, a passive look rest on his face. And it seemed wrong, like Derek's moods didn't normally drop. Helix stepped toward him, thinking about his brother. About how Derek looked like he could have been the middle child. About he would take any comfort he could get and hugging him was an extremely strong impulse.

“What does he want with me?” He asked, a shake in his voice that he couldn't get rid of.

“He thinks you're a hero.” There was sincerity in his words, but the look across his face spoke of confusion. “I don't think you are. Nothing meant by it, it's just, I dunno. You're just a kid.” His eyebrows knit, and he frowned tightly. “I've never seen him so keen on anything like he was on you. I asked him, but he told me you were a hero. But he wasn't that interested in Garth. I've never seen him so engrossed with something, someone.” Helix shuttered, unnerved as he swore he felt never blinking eyes on him now. Like he could feel the Commandant reaching for his back. He glanced behind him, nothing was there. He looked at Derek again. “You're scared shitless.”

“W-Wouldn't you be?” Helix whispered.

“Yeah. I would be.” It was quiet for a moment. Derek stared down at him with a look that Adam had given him. 'God, I wish I could just get you out of this situation.'

“I'm sorry. A-about your mates. I really didn't want to hurt them.” Derek shook his head, even laughing a little.

“I could tell you didn't, besides, it's not like we weren't attacking you. We were.” Helix put away the gun, shaking his head.

“P-please, don't tell him you saw me.” Derek shrugged.

“I'll try. I blow my cover so often.”

“If it gets to the point where he will hurt you, tell him.” Helix amended. “Where have you searched?”

“Bright Wood, Bower Lake, and now here.”

“Do you think he'll return to Bright Wood quick?”

“I have a feeling we'll go to Rock Ridge first.” Helix nodded,

“O-Okay. T-Thank you, Derek.”

“What's your name, kid?”

“Helix.” He hushed, like the walls would hear him and tell the Commandant. Derek watched him for a long moment, carefully reaching out and ruffling his hair. Helix felt a sense of warmth deep in his stomach, it fought the paranoia back for a moment.

“Alright, Helix. Try and-”

“Derek, where are you?” A sharp shiver played up Helix's spine like a xylophone, making him stand harder into his hand. Helix glanced around, jumping behind some crates and holding his knees to his chest tightly. He stared at the dust on the wood grain, begging any deity who would listen that Derek was the decent man he seemed to be.

“Back here, Commandant.” Derek began to move to meet him, trying to keep him away from the back area as much as possible. “Was checking back here for him. Ain't found nothing yet.”

“A good idea, he is far to smart to not be hiding and hiding well. I have a feeling that this will be quite the hunt.” Helix hated the way he said hunt, like he was chasing big game. A trophy animal that was nearly extinct.

“Do you think he went back to Bright Wood?”

“No, not yet at least. There was nothing in the Tower of use. As much as it pains me to say it, we might have to break off into two groups. Something tells me he will be able to avoid any amount of grunts I send after him. I will end up capturing him, I believe. It will be more of sending enough men to stop him and turn him back toward me.”

“You think? He avoided you pretty well.”

“I will adapt. Those explosives he had were interesting, but not enough to pierce my jacket. He will have to do better than that next time, or I will have my hands on him.”

“What do you want with him, really? Is he really the third?”

“I believe so.”

“And what if you're wrong?”

“Then perhaps we will bring him to our side. He is rather impressive at what he does, he did take out six men and avoid me. Kill five. Do you not think he is worth it?”

“Oh, I'd definitely say he's worth it, I just... I think you scared the shit out of him. Maybe... Talk to him? Cause I was trying to and it seemed to work.”

“I do not think he will speak with me until I catch him in a corner.”

“Just try, will ya'?” Derek asked. “You're gonna give him a heart attack.”

“You speak like you know him.” Helix never felt his fingers and toes go numb as quickly as they did then.

“I speak like I watched the kid run.” Derek replied, as Helix tried to smile, but found himself very upset. Sobbing would only lead to him being captured however, so he held his emotions so tightly anhedonia began to seep into every pore. “Come on. Nothing back here but rats.” He walked passed him as the Commandant turned, following him. His boots slowly fading into the rest of the bustle in the city. Helix didn't want to move, didn't want to get out of his spot. He felt like those eyes were still on him, watching... Like the Commandant would reach over the crate, and bury his claws into him. Waiting for him to let his guard down enough so that he could get close, close enough that Helix swatted at the back of his neck, sure he was being breathed on. He wasn't trying to, purposefully, hurt him, but Avo that made Helix feel **no** better. He wanted to capture him, toy with the idea he was a hero and keep him like a pet. Like a prize. Why? The Commandant knew that he wasn't the third, right? He couldn't truly believe that someone as stunted in Albion's norm, was a hero. Helix was tiny compared to the normal population, coming in at a solid five foot four inches. Most men clocked in about where Blade did, six feet and two inches. Helix was a complete and utter runt. The Commandant was smart, though. Did he realize that Helix made the gauntlets and the pile bunker by himself? No one else had them. Is that why, because of Helix's deep interest in guns? And why was this need so pungent, like Derek said, why was he so desperate? The only person that knew anything about him was Garth and he still didn't know much. Helix slowly looked over the crate, climbing onto the roof and taking the rooftops back toward Bower Lake. Hero hill was his only sanctuary for now, and even then, the damp, cold stone walls would likely feel close to a prison.

' _Nothing will stop me._ ' Helix shook the Commandant's promise from his mind. All he could do was run and try to be prepared if he met him again. Though, something told him no matter what, the Commandant was going to get what he wanted. And that left Helix frigid and aching from the constant adrenaline fueling his pathetic attempts to run.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading my self indulgent stuff!


	4. Fear Personified

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots! of violence in this one. Lots of creepy bullshit too. yaaaaaaaay, let's rejoice in my characters suffering together, lol. Thanks for reading!

Helix walked down the hooked road toward the small abandoned shack he was staying at. It was made from mostly scrap metal, with a single window toward the right of the door. The glass was the kind that if you touched it it would shred everything on you and then you. It was only one room, with a small stove and no bed. The floor use to be wood but termites and other pests gnawed away at it until it was dirt with some busted wood glued to the ground. It was probably once a decent camp, but Helix would take any shelter at this point. He swore something or someone was watching him like a hawk. He pulled his arms up, crossing them and holding himself. He felt dirty, he hadn't really showered in a day and he was just miserable. Again, Blade and Garth hadn't talked to him. But Hammer reassured him and spoke with him every day, multiple times a day. It had been two days after his talk with Giles, and he was beginning to feel more and more like the burden he swore he was. Giles spoke to him over the seal, detailing that he was trying his best to sell the farm and was probably going to low ball it just to get them on the ship. He said that getting there wasn't bad at all and that the price for two tickets onto a ship was fair. That people said that Shianna was a beautiful town to visit and could benefit from some people with brilliant minds “like Helix's.” That the cost of living was doable. He was angry that he was causing this, that Giles couldn't get what he deserved for that farm land he had toiled over, bleed on, sobbed about. That they fought together against Ripper for. Helix ignored the feeling of eyes swiping across his back like he some ravishing prize to be won. He was sure that it was just the paranoia. It had been for two days. But something moved inside the metal building. His heart began beating quicker, Helix clicked the holster for the magnum open, his fear spiking as he swore he heard something inside the hut react to the tiny noise. He was waiting for the Commandant to kick the door open, and grasp him by his scruff; pick him up like a helpless kitten. Helix drew up his magnum, looking down the flat barrel and through the neon sights. The well polished, mercury like casing of the gun glinting in the low light of dusk. He paused, no birds were singing, only the tree frogs broke the silence. That normally meant that someone who didn't know how to move through the forest was around. Helix glanced back behind him slightly as he kept his chin tucked into his shoulder. He watched the bushes and trees rustle softly in the calm breeze. Nothing was a solid object other than the tree trunks. Nothing reacted to being looked at as he turned his head to the other side. The wind whispered for him to get inside or something would come. Nothing. Helix flicked his eyes forward, clicking on his flashlight and smashing his foot into the door. A raccoon turned and hissed, skittering toward him and snapping its drool covered jaws. He cracked back onto his ass, breathlessly wheezing instead of screaming like he wanted to. Something told him it was good he didn't scream however, his skin raising in bumps as he shook from fear. Helix scrambled back, eyes wide as it waddled out of the house, spitting. He stood and stepped away until it simply wandered off. He pulled up his gun again, stepping into the small shack. Nothing. Nothing else, Helix. It's okay. Just a raccoon. He exhaled shakily, flicking off his light and putting the gun into his holster, clicking it closed. He stepped back, turning to shut the door. His eyes followed up as a large hand pressed up against the ceiling- Helix stepped back as the Commandant stepped into the shack, bent over slightly.

“How smart of you, little one. I was sure that you wouldn't do something so obvious. I was extremely lucky to havespotted you **.** ” His eyes brushed over the dingy shack. Helix backed away from him, shying away from his compliment. It felt so wrong, it felt dirty. It felt like Helix hadn't showered in a week. “You've avoided me well. I am ever so impressed.” Helix's back hit the corner of the shack, and with every ounce of him, he wanted to sprint through the window. The Commandant took a sharp step side ways, blocking both exits with his large body. It seemed like he was rather good at reading body language. At the very least, he read Helix well. Then again, anyone could tell that Helix was spring loaded and ready to jump at any exit he could find. The light flooding into the living space was dampened as Helix pressed harder against the wall, sliding down slowly. His eyes landed on Helix fully finally, as he stalked toward him step by step. Dust kicked up as he scrapped his boot across the crooked floor. “A rather good psychoanalysis you did on me. You are rather brilliant, are you not?” The Commandant slowly knelt just out of kicking range- Too close. Helix shook, looking at him. “Though I already knew that.” Though he couldn't see details, he was again in awe with how massive he was. He realized this was the closest he had been, and if he stood right now, he would only come up to the bottom of the Commandant's shoulder. Helix overlooked his own weapons, looking down at his own legs in hopes that the Commandant's creeping form would vanish. No. No, he wasn't there! Helix tugged his knee to his chest when he tried to wrap his fingers around his ankle. He grasped a rock and chucked it at his face, as he tipped his head to the side sharply.

“G-get aw-away from m-me!” Helix whimpered, his voice weak and broken. The Commandant shifted closer, trapping his outstretched leg with a hand under his knee cap, on his shin. He was surprised with how nonthreatening his grip was. It certainly wasn't about to be thrown off, however. He squeezed his eyes shut, wanting to sob. His mind played a delusion that the Commandant could snap his leg two with just a flex of his hand, leaving Helix completely at his mercy. A sure fire way to keep him right where he wanted him.

“Do not worry, I am not going to harm you. I promise.” Lair, you're hurting me now. Helix flinched away from his hand despite the promises. The feeling of his corpse cold palm slipping against his cheek drew a sharp quiver from him. It lingered, the cold felt like frost bite. “You feel as though you are running a fever.” Helix shrunk away as he touched his forehead, unnerved by the... gentle hand, or the masquerade of kindness. He was sure that the Commandant couldn't feel. He wondered if his nerve endings even worked. He brushed his cheek with his thumb, “Besides that, the chase is over,” Helix looked up at him with just his eyes, watching the Commandant's form look him over. “You belong with me.” He took Helix's hand, gently trying to prompt him to stand with a tug. Helix yanked his hand away, a cry leaving him. He forgot his talons- They dug right into his skin and sliced his hand open with three decent scratches on the top and one on his palm. From what Helix could see he looked mortified, like he had harmed a rare animal he just tranquilized. It cemented in Helix's mind that this wasn't a hunt, it was a chase. He _did_ want Helix alive- Helix snapped to look at the door as three grunts crashed into it, seeming surprised with how small the building was. How the Commandant seemed to have everything under control. The Commandant snapped to look at them. Helix took every ounce of strength in himself and smashed his foot that was curled to his chest into The Commandant's face when he snapped back to look at Helix. He grunted loudly, toppling onto his back as Helix dove through the window, scratches from the glass littering through his scalp and all down his unprotected arms. He sprinted away, listening to the barking and the shouting of the men that where descending quickly around him. Helix slid behind a tree. He could hear the chatter from the horde all around him. There was nothing but the army. No longer were the tree frogs humming and making the area slightly more tolerable. He felt out of place, like he didn't belong here. Helix looked down, trying to find that one tree with the roots exposed. He thanked Avo, ducking into a hole under a tree that was just big enough for him to squeeze into, as Helix pulled moss and dead needles into it, making himself look like part of the dirt. He shuttered at the feeling of displacing a bunch of small bugs, but he simply covered his face with dirt and mud, settling. Still as the ground other then how he shook, just like someone that hada severe fever.

“C-Commandant, I'm sor-” A scream left the man's throat as he was thrown into a massive oak tree. The will power involved was something Helix hadn't seen Garth use, though he had never shown him his true extent. The grunt shattered from the force. His body landed on the ground, still and bent like a doll for it's master's pleasure. His arms twisted, one back and sticking up with his fingers disjointed and the other snapped in half, the skin stretching oddly over the misplaced bones. His legs both so broken it looked like someone stuffed his pants instead of real legs. Helix put his hands over his mouth, his shaking only growing worse. Step out like a man, stop him from hurting anyone else. Save them, they did nothing wrong! Helix pressed back deeper into the little dirt cave, instead.

“I-I-” Helix looked up as the Commandant grasped a second man, walking into the clearing. Helix cursed himself, he should have taken the chance and ran. The clearing was the only one for a while. Of course he's going to bring his men here to regroup- Or to kill. He could see vague shapes of other men gathering from the commotion. He wanted to shut his eyes, but something deep inside his head hissed that if he was going to inadvertently kill these men because he was so weak, he would watch.

“Where. Is he?”

“I-I don't know-”

“Of course you do not.” The Commandant snarled up at him. “You let him get away. You ruined my chance!” He roared down at him. The man flinched, pleading quietly- “He was MINE!” The Commandant grasped him by the throat, and swept his feet out from under him. The ground shook as he smashed his entire body against it. The grunt pleaded softly as he gripped his arm. “You do not deserve the energy I waste on you.” He hissed, smashing him down against the ground harshly and raising his hand. His massive, dangerous talons shown in the pale light. He cleaved his hand down, shredding the guys face. He began screaming and thrashing, as he clawed at him like a bear. He buried his hand into his arm as he tried to go for his throat. The sight of the man loosing his fight and becoming a marionette for the Commandant to throw around and claw at was dug deep into his brain. It felt like a nightmare that he just couldn't wake from. Helix couldn't tear his eyes off the man. He was warped, he didn't look human anymore. Just pieces of meat and a vaguely humanoid shape. Helix watched as the Commandant straightened to full height, sparking brightly as shock cracked and hissed over his body. Lightening flashed and arced across his arms, flickering in wild patterns. Garth said that Will was affected by emotions, that was how he wanted to try and get Helix to cast. He tried so hard, but there was nothing. Helix had nothing to show for all the sorrow and terror he harbored. He turned, grasping another man- Helix could see him in the blue light, one of the men that charged the shack. He held him so harshly that his claws dug in. He was bleeding profusely as he hoisted him up until his arm was extended completely. He looked like he was nothing more than a child for the Commandant to heave over his head. Helix gripped a root, eyes stuck to the man who choked and pleaded for his life- The Commandant ignited, electricity ran up and down them both. The man began howling incoherently and gagging on the air he could get into his frying lungs. Helix flinched and covered a gag as the smokey scent of burning flesh floated down wind. He watched as his body wilted, his skin tightening to his muscles and his eyes sinking into his skull as the water was burned from his body. The entire time, he was screaming. He was begging. He was crying.

A sharp scream left him as the Commandant flashed with power, busting his head open with the voltage. His body went limp. He tossed him hard, as Helix jumped as he skid toward him. Not to close, but close enough that Helix could see his lips where glued to his teeth and his eyes weren't even there anymore, showing into the back of his exploded skull, only filled with moon light. Helix tried not to vomit at the smell, centering himself. Breathe, breathe. He jumped as the Commandant turned to his men, “Find him or I will massacre you all!” He shouted. He looked forward as a grunt shoved the charred man back toward the base of another tree, thank Avo. He noticed that around the Commandant the tall, pretty grass was now charred. Helix couldn't believe that a moment ago this was the man touching his forehead and asking if he had a fever. He could do this to Helix! He could do this to anyone he wanted! He was unstoppable, Blade couldn't beat him, nor Garth or Hammer or even all of them combined. Helix wondered if Kartheus could, but he did them no good now. Helix watched him turn toward him. He shut his eyes tightly, sure that the whites in them would give him away. He listened to everyone quietly moving toward his left. They seemed to be slowly migrating toward the bandit coast. He didn't care at this point, all he wanted was to get away from this field and never set foot in it again.

“Commandant-” It was Derek.

“Mays.” It was sharp, and full of promises to execute anyone to said the slightest wrong thing.

“What do you want from me?”

“I had him in my hands. He was mine!” He barked, brightly crackling. Derek backed away from him. “I did not see what way he went, he kicked me in the face.” He shook his head. “The boy hurt himself, though. When he went through the window he cut himself up. He cut himself on my claws, too.” He looked down at his hand. “I had pinned his leg and grabbed his hand. He pulled his hand away and sliced himself up. If they had just-” The Commandant sparked wildly, as Derek stared up at him with horror stretched over his face. “If nothing else we can track his blood.” Helix hadn't even thought of that. He was bleeding, glancing down at the cuts that still well with blood. He swallowed his fear and sat there, his eyes mostly closed still. He watched the men move through slits and bide his time. He watched Derek try to talk with him.

“Did you have to kill those three?”

“They distracted me enough so that he could escape.” For a long moment the Commandant looked forlorn. He looked at his hand again, rubbing the pads of his fingers with his other hand. “He will not last much longer. He is tired and paranoid. Perhaps even sick. Soon, he will collapse right into my arms.”

“Commandant-” The Commandant looked down at him.

“What, Derek?”

“This isn't right.”

“I suggest a change in tune.”

“No.” Helix snapped his eyes open, watching Derek. “This kid isn't a hero. He's barely escaping you and it's environmental or it's someone else 'helping' him.” Derek glared up at him in the darkness. “You're out of control. Your obsessed with him.”

“I am doing my job.”

“Look at you!” Derek barked, grasping his hand and motioning. “You're touching your own hand like you've met God.”

“I like my jobs done quick and without flaw. You know this. Getting a simple grip on him only fuels my desire to capture him. It enrages me.”

“Commandant. Look me in the eye and tell me you aren't going to rip this kid into pieces.” They seemed to lock eyes.

“I want no harm to come to him. I felt nothing but anger at myself when he cut his hand on my claws.” He tipped his head. “I will be apologizing to him, if that is why you are upset.”

“I'm upset because when you talk about him there is something in your eyes that I don't feel like it should be there.” The Commandant inhaled sharply, sighing.

“Derek, I do not wish to harm him-”

“We're meant to be friends.” The Commandant watched him, not saying anything for a long moment.

“Friends?” He whispered. “Then why are you doubting me so? Should you not be helping me-”

“I still don't know what you want from him. He's not the third. There is no way-”

“No way?” The Commandant hissed, taking a step toward him. Derek began to back away, as he followed. “Did you see the guns he had onhis belt? They where something I've never seen before. He, if not a hero, is a genius. One that would be worth seeking out.”

“Then ask him!” Derek hissed. “Stop chasing him and ask!”

“I will admit after my... initial reaction, I know he will not join me willingly.”

“Then-” The Commandant looked down at him.

“You knew what you signed up for, coming, Derek. You knew that Garth would not want to come with us. Why, pray tell, are you all upset about him and not Garth?”

“I haven't met Garth-”

“ _ **Met**_?” The Commandant husked, his fingers cracking.

“You know what I mean. He's just a kid.”

“And Garth is just an innocent man. So was the first heroes father. You never complained.” The Commandant took a sharp lunge forward, grasping Derek by the collar. “You. Met. Him.”

“Maybe I fucking did.” Derek seethed. “What are you going to do about it, huh?” Derek almost switched to a purr. “Kill me. Go ahead. But he likes me, so watch him hate you more.” Derek leaned closer. “Because that's what you've got. He hates you, and regardless of if you capture him or not, he'll never work with you.” The Commandant dropped him, glaring down at him.

“We will see, will we not?”

“You're out of fucking control. The only time I've ever seen you like this is when Lucien is in danger.”

“Lord Lucien.” He corrected Derek, watching him. “Perhaps I am. As are you.”

“Crazy is what crazy does.”

“So be it, but he will not escape me again, with or without your help.”

“Maybe you'll find yourself against two.” Derek snarled, full of nothing but vitriol.

“I will break you in front of him.” They snarled and bristled at each other.

“You would, you fucking wretched sociopath. Fuck you.” Derek spun, marching away as the Commandant followed, growling under his breath. Moments turned into minutes as finally the tree frogs began to sing again, and then even the birds. He sat in trepidation, and in remorse. Helix dug his fingers into the sandy dirt in front of himself, yanking free a few handfuls as he struggled out. He stumbled up and began mindlessly gathering the three bodies together. He dropped his bag and pulled out a table cloth. It was all he had, it felt so insignificant. They died for him, how dare he place a plastic cover over them and keep it weighted down with rocks from near by. He should toil and bury every single one of them in their own six foot grave. Helix gripped his arm to his chest tightly. He had to leave. Had to. If the Commandant was tracking his blood he was be back soon. His fists curled tightly. The next time he saw him, if he did, he promised deep down to himself and to these men that he would fight. His running had worked so far, but he barely got away this time. How much closer did he need the Commandant to get before he began acting? Helix turned, springing into a sprint and running back toward Bower Lake regardless of the burning in his body that wanted to drop him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This boy scared. I mean, I would be too.


	5. What Do You See?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Woo! I updated it!  
> This one is a tad more dubious. Helix doesn't like this one bit. But I hope you do!

Helix gasped as he came into the waking world. Pain dragging him into awareness as he cracked onto the wood floor. He exhaled hard, watching dust bunnies roll further under the bed. It smelled like burning wood and ale. He looked up, watching the candle light dance across the welcoming yellow walls. 

He wanted to believe he would be safe here, but he knew better. He had watched Lucien's army march right into the town square and no one questioned or stopped them. Helix pulled himself up with the help of the bed frame, stumbling slightly and grasping for his belt. He paused. He looked around quickly, finding it hanging on the bed frame. Whatever, stress and all, he probably just tossed it when he laid down. He put all his gear back, ensuring he had it all and quietly made his way back down stairs.

He was overly cautious, checking the corners of the place. All he saw was the barkeep polishing the wood bar to a shine and a games master in the corner. He wondered where everyone was, this place always had someone in it. Slowly, he stepped outside. He could hear the Bower River running from where he was standing. The games master began humming an eerily cheery tune. Not even the Town Crier was out. The silence was broken by sharp, marching footsteps. Helix ducked behind a stand and watched a man walk from Fairfax Gardens toward Old Town. He couldn't see him, but a haunting air of familiarity brushed by on the breeze. The footsteps dulled enough that he could hear the humming again. I swear, I know who he is. Who was that? Helix grit his teeth, grinding them and creating a horrid squealing noise.

In the silence it felt like he screamed in a library. Helix chased the man, keeping himself hidden in the shadows and light footed compared to him. He turned down the road to go toward where Rose and Blade use to live. Helix steeled himself, now feeling a need to know who he was. He walked up toward him, his mind racing. He was never able to get a word in.  
"When you look at me, what do you see?" Helix watched his back, his hand on his magnum now. He was wearing decent clothing, with long black hair in a thick, solid braid. A big man, but not as big as Blade or Hammer.  
"I-I'm sorry?" Helix tried, unsure of what he truly wanted him to say.  
"When you." A flicker, almost like static. "Look at me." Helix's eyes snapped up, watching him. No, that can't be right- "What do you." Helix watched in horror as it flickered to the Commandant's back, switching rapidly, fuzzy and misty. "See?" He swallowed. "Do you see?" Helix watched it flicker back to the man, who glanced over his shoulder just enough, his piercing, black eyes watching him tremble. "Do you think I am… nothing?" It changed back, the Commandant watched him over his shoulder. "Do you really believe that I am simply evil?" He glanced back down, as the man flickered back into reality. "Or do you think your leader is holy?" Helix was hysterical, he couldn't understand- was this will power? Was he using his humanity against him? He couldn't see his face, but he tipped his head enough, showing his teeth in a feral smile. "You. Don't think that. You can. Really get away from. Me. Do you?" Their voices merged. The frightening smile shifted between them both, though the lower half was missing for the Commandant, the upper half was missing for the other man. It felt like a horrid amalgamation of man and beast- "Is that what you see?" He tensed. "Fear?" It finally flickered into focus as the Commandant turned to him. Helix shook in his boots, fear clawed at his insides. All that talk and thought of being tough, of acting? It was wiped away when his cold, white eyes landed on him. "Have you even thought about why you are scared?" Helix stepped back as he stepped toward him. "Do you not try and give every person that you come across the benefit of the doubt? Blade. Derek. Why am I exempt?" He backed away more as The Commandant began to creep closer. He seemed so jaded that he didn't question him knowing about Blade. Helix jolted, ducking under him.

He spun much faster than he thought he could and grasped his arms, tugging him closer. His fingers were like ice, frigid and deathly strong. Helix shook, watching him regard him. He brought his hand up, tipping Helix's head up. They both looked at each other now. Helix could see clearly the small things he couldn't before. He had small veins through his eyes that let Helix know where he was looking now. Right at him. He had deep crows feet when, his eyes were rather expressive, using those crows feet to their advantage. Helix didn't really wish to be that close anymore. He was beginning to understand that the Commandant might be right. He didn't even give him a chance, but neither did he give one to Helix. He ran, he chased. He chased him like game. He scares him. He began to squirm. 

"P-please let me g-go." He rasped, grounding his feet, but he tugged him closer still, he was underneath him, it felt like. His frozen fingers felt like a metal pole Helix's skin was sticking to in the dead of winter.

"I see." He looked up at him again. "Do you wish to know what I see?" Helix jumped as his arm coiled around him, burying Helix into his chest. His grip became devastating. Helix whimpered, struggling as much as he could, but he could feel him rub his hand against his hair like a happy pet owner. Tears began to run down his face in despair. His squirming was like nothing, just a fly to him. He began to settle, letting the Commandant do as he pleased.  
"I see a smart boy. I see someone broken. I see someone losing focus. I see mistakes." He jumped as he was an inch away, holding his jaw again to keep him there. Helix's heart was stammering in his chest. "I see what's mine, Helix." 

Helix cried out, jumping up and thrashing around. He desperately tried to shake off the feeling of hands; of the cold. His back smashed into the wall as he brushed himself off violently. He bawled, his shuttering and whimpering continuing for minutes. He wretched and gasped because of his inability to control his breathing, and he clawed and scratched at his skin to get the feeling back. His name. He couldn't know it, if he found out then Helix felt like he would never let it go. If he found out somehow, it would be from Derek and… he could almost guarantee that Derek would be dead for it. He didn't want anyone else to die because of this fucked up mess!

Finally, he began to tune back into reality. He could hear the chattering of the bar room underneath him. The warmth of fire places roaring and the safety of the room around him calmed him further. Helix felt utterly hopeless, like he would never be able to escape this dangerous bastard on the opposite side of the war. Even in his sleep, he was standing over him. Watching. Waiting. He was playing right into his hand, he knew this was what the Commandant wanted. He wanted him to crumble to the point of fucking up and landing himself right in front of him. But to be fair, what else was Helix going to do? He was scared for his life, for everyone around him. And even if Helix wanted to ignore it, he didn't know what the Commandant wanted. But he knew it was nothing innocent. At the very least he genuinely thought Helix was a hero and he would keep him until Blade saved him or the Spire was completed. If he we not a hero he was sure he would be slaughtered. If not, it was for his own personal gain, and Helix couldn't begin to guess, and he really, really didn't want to. His mind immediately went to the worse case. He didn't want to be caught like that. He curled tight and cried again. Even in a dream he froze, how did he expect to face a titan when he was just a worthless kid? Even a hero verses a titan sounded laughable. He needed two more days, hopefully. Just two.  
Just. Two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that felt real bad for you as bad as it is for Helix. We will get another dose of the real Commandant next time.  
> I do so enjoy putting Helix through this. I hope you got some enjoyment too. :>  
> Poor kid, better buck up. Things only get worse from here.


	6. Cat, Mouse, Roundhouse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one hurts.

A soft gasp left him as he tried to catch his breath.

    “Easy on the drink, boy.” The paternal tone the barkeep took with him made a dusting of red flash over him.

    “S-Sorry.” He had stayed in the Cow and Corset in hopes that the threat of many would keep the army at bay. He knew he was asking far to much, and that his luck was running out. Again, his thought was they had marched right into Bowerstone before and no one questioned or stopped them. He looked down at the frosty glass, catching his reflection. What could he see? He saw tired eyes, disparity, and depression. He saw someone distraught to live a normal life. Giles told him it was taking longer than he thought, that he just needed some time. Helix didn't have time. Minutes, maybe hours, but the Commandant would hunt him down again and again until he couldn't run anymore. He closed his eyes, trying to come to terms with the fact that he would find him. Not only find him but relentlessly pursue him until he wore himself out. Like a dog off the leash. Tried to talk himself into fighting back, that he could get away again, as many times as he had to. Told himself he was worth more than he was giving himself credit for. He tried to talk himself up, but he found himself drinking ale that he normally couldn't even stick his nose over.

    “Helix, don't move.” He looked up with just his eyes toward the barkeep, figuring maybe a bee was on him. “Army man just walked in, get up nice and normal and go up-”

    “Hey!” Never that simple, huh?

    “Don't. Move.” He smiled at the officer, nodding to him. “What can I get ya', son?”

    “I ain't talking to you, I'm talking to the kid.” Helix glanced up into the mirror behind the bar. He was getting closer, almost quickly. What do you see? His eyes flicked to himself. I see someone at a breaking point. He grasped the thick handle and whipped around, glassing the guard's jaw and laying him out on the floor. The shards sang on the ground while everyone in the bar looked on, silent and shocked. He stepped forward, planting his foot on his chest and pulling his magnum. The gun clicked in the stunned quiet of the pub. Silence was suspicious. He looked over at everyone and tried to control his already overwhelming terror.

    “Talk. Now.” Everyone jumped back into trying to have their conversations, nervous and prying eyes flicking back over often. The chatter was strained, but there. No longer so alarmingly out of place. Helix looked down at the guard trying to recover from the powerful strike. If an officer was here, so was _he_. It made his breath hitch. Was this the last time he was going to be free? And he wasted it depression drinking?

    “C-Come on, kid. You-” He flinched as Helix shoved the gun closer, shaking harshly now. This is all my fault.

    “Shut up.” Helix warned, his teeth clenched tight. He knew he couldn't shoot him. Everyone and their brother would hear it and flood into the pub to stop him. He didn't have many options, and it seemed like the longer he stood here the more time was wasted on not getting away from that fucking army.

    “P-please, I got fam-” Helix stepped forward sharply and stomped on his throat, grinding his heel in so he couldn't yelp. He choked and thought about thrashing, but he pressed the barrel of the gun to his forehead.

    “I. Said. Quiet.” Helix hissed down at him. He nodded. Helix stood straight, keeping the gun aimed at his face. This was escalating faster than he could handle. He wanted to shut this jerk up with a beating. His hand shook worse. He just wanted him to shut up. To stop being a threat! He had never felt so out of control toward someone, never felt such a quick change from I wish to let you go to I want to strangle you and bash your head in. Then again, the chance that this officer could be his undoing was driving his intense hatred to surface aggressively. The poor guy cowered under him even though he was much larger. He knew he was taking his anger out on someone who didn't want, hopefully, to hurt him. His eyes skipped around for anything that could help him solve this problem.

    “Scarf.” Helix stated, catching the scratchy, thick scarf the barkeep tossed at him. He kicked the officer onto his stomach and gagged him quickly. He wished he could have apologized when he whined in pain, but he grasped his hands and zip tied them together, pulling tight. Helix breathed heavily, feeling like he breached from a pool of viscous fluid. He rubbed his sternum and wheezed quietly.

    “Helix.” He looked up at the barkeep, who brandished a bronze key. “Use this to unlock a window-” Another few officers crashed in, looking around- “Go!” Helix turned, trying to catch the key that bounced right from his hand,

    “Fuck.” Helix wheezed,

    “Break one!” He sprinted up the stairs, stealing a chair right out from under a higher class lady. She crashed to the floor, slowing the officers behind him as Helix hurled the chair and shattered the glass. He flinched from the sound but leaped out of the window and grasped a hold of the building there, scaling it quickly. He ran forward, leaping over onto the blacksmith's roof.

    “On the roof!” Helix ignored him, sprinting down the rooftops toward Old Town. He spring boarded off some boxes, rolling on the next roof and launched forward, leaping over the gaps. He glanced down, thanking Avo that he was running fast enough that no one had caught up just yet. He breathed a sharp breath, leaping down next to the junction to go toward where Rose lived. Grasping a flag pole and rolling across the ground he lunging forward and sprinting toward Rock Ridge. He skid to a stop as more of the Spire's men came up from the staircase in front of him, and some from that small side ally. It felt like he was being stared at by homicidal maniacs. He did cause them to go running cross country, but he hoped that maybe they would forgive him for that. Understand why Helix might run away from their leader. Helix turned, holding tight to his magnum's grip. Cornered, frightened. He stepped away as the Commandant and his other men caught up to him. He rose his hands as if to say 'I'm unarmed.' Helix bristled at him like a caged cub.

    "You have impressed me more and more these past few days. I am eager for us to work together. Once you give me the chance, you will find me a very powerful ally. But now it is time for you to come with me.”

"I don't want to." Helix rasped quietly. 

"Certainly you are not getting the help you need to make the effects you wish to make." He reached for Helix. Everyone startled or yelped as Helix slapped his hand away. Even Helix looked down at his arm for a flash, eyes wide and panicked.

    “I said, **NO**!” He barked, holding his ground even though he looked frantic. It was silent for a long moment. He glanced around, hoping that maybe just one person would help. Would say, 'Hey, maybe this is fucked?' But no one looked that way, just shocked expressions as if to say, you hit **HIM**? Derek wasn't in the sea of men that crowded around them, or he wasn't right there at least.

    “What are we waiting for?” Helix's eyes snapped to a man that motioned to Helix. “He's not going to fight us, he's too scared.” There was this haunting look on his face. “Pretty pathetic, really.” Like he enjoyed this. Helix stepped away from him, as he swiped at him. Helix punched forward, nailing him with the pile bunker and sending him packing into the Commandant. It only knocked him off balance but the message was sent. Suddenly, it was stunned tension from the other side. He spun, nailing his foot into the jaw of a spire guard that tried to grasp his arm. His mouth kicked right out of place and he dropped. Helix inhaled,

    "I just need a little time.” Giles stated in his head. He exhaled and cracked his knee up into another guards dick, sending him onto the ground, cross combo right, left, high kicking another and leaving him to wilt. He turned, pulling up his magnum and firing at the Commandant, five bullets hit the wall as he teleported into cover. He knew how to fight. He knew damn well that he was good at it because he was still alive after all he went through. But he wished that he didn't have to. Why fight when this doesn't have to happen? But no one else seemed to think that way, maybe he was stupid. Maybe naïve, but probably stupid. It didn't matter anymore. Helix ducked away from a sword, front kicking it out of the guys hands and punching him into the wall. He slid down. Helix reloaded his pile bunker and gauntlet quickly, placing his magnum in the holster after reloading that too. Seemed everyone was hesitant to come near him suddenly. Helix narrowly ducked under the Commandant's hand as he tried to grab him again. Beat him, and they'll stop, right? Helix stepped away sharply, flexing his hands. Drop him and everyone will collectively shit their pants. 

    “This need not happen, little one. Just come with me. You will come to enjoy the Spire, enjoy working with me.” It seemed like a genuine attempt at being friendly. It unnerved Helix that he was still trying to put up this friendly face. Why, what did this get him? What did he want?

    “I'm going taxidermy your and Lucien's head!” Helix snarled, trying to intimidate him or at least the men around him.

    “Christ-”

    “Fuck.” A couple of guards sputtered out.

“We will see, will we not?” He replied, almost sternly. Almost as if to say, 'Do you wish to try that again?' Helix ignored the uncomfortable, hot wash of almost shame it gave him. He stepped forward, striking like a cobra to try and grasp something on Helix to get a hold of him. Helix dropped under his hand, punching up into his chest. Helix gasped at his mistake as the Commandant grasped him by the throat and smashed him into a wall. Fear crawled up his throat and his toes curled against the soles of his boots. It seemed it was more a warning, he could feel the Commandant refusing to clench down. Helix glanced down at him, the sun glint off his jacket and the shards on his head. Helix began fighting ferociously, finally having a plan in place. Helix planted his boot onto his shoulder, and high kicked his mouth as hard as he could with his other leg. The Commandant let go, backing away in pain. Helix bolted, skidding around him and leaping up his back like he was climbing a mountain. If he collapsed on him he would have a hard time getting away but now's not the time. Helix reeled back, laying his knee on his shoulder and coming down with all the gauntlet had to offer. He cracked his hand into his head and felt the ringing in his own arm. He couldn't believe he didn't bust one of the shards. He also didn't knock the Commandant unconscious yet, but he gave him something to fucking think about from the shout that left him. Helix reeled again,

    “Commandant!” He reached up, grasping under Helix's knee and pulling, his fingers clamping on his calf. It forced him to splay down his back in an arch, his other leg trapped behind his back. It was far from comfortable, and rather frightening when Helix knocked against his back and looked down. The ground seemed so far away, and if he dropped him now he would likely land right on his head. Helix locked his leg against his spine with his knee as high as he could get it and crunched up, grasping a shard to keep him up and feeling for his magnum- He glanced down, the mercury like casing shimmered on the bloody ground. He snarled, grasping his knife instead and sliced at the Commandant's wrist. He yanked Helix forward, eyes wide as Helix took a brutal swing at his face as he rounded him. The Commandant yanked back, spiking Helix down into the ground with an over the shoulder throw. Helix held his chest for a second, breathing heavily. He looked up, terrified to see the Commandant standing over him like that. In a dominating position of power, he expected him to step on or kick him but Helix took his stillness and struck first. He lunged forward, trying to bury his knife into his leg under the jacket. He wouldn't make the mistake of forgetting how the jacket worked again.

    “Get away from me!” The Commandant danced backward, narrowing his eyes.

    “I do not wish to hurt you.”

    “Then stand there and die!” He watched the Commandant jut forward and throw a hard punch. Helix tried for the magnum, jumping around him. Immediately knew that he made a fatal error. The Commandant pivoted on his heel and spun in a rather impressive fashion for how huge he was. He buried his leg into Helix's right side with a brutal roundhouse. He cracked onto the ground and rolled a few times before he gripped the ground. Tiny whimpers left him as he tried to get back into the fight. He couldn't- He couldn't get up. He had to have busted a rib, might have been more. He gasped and wheezed, his trembling returned. He grasped his knife and dragged himself into the corner near him. His head rolled back in pain for a moment, but he brought up the knife as a shadow cast over him.

    “It is over, little one. Let-” Helix swung at him, snarling.

    “Get the FUCK away from me!” He barked. He knew he looked terrified, he could feel a couple of tiny tears drop off his jaw. The Commandant's eyes settled on the knife- Helix held it to his own throat. “I said GET AWAY FROM ME!” It stilled again. The Commandant stared at him now.

"Give me the knife, little one." Blood pooled into his collar line as he accidentally grazed himself. His heart stammered. What was it like to cut your own throat? Did it hurt? Did you die fast, or slow? He dug the point of the knife in more, just slightly. Could it just be over in a way he could handle?

    “Helix!” He looked over, eyes wide as Derek shoved his way through a few men. He jumped as his hand was yanked away from his throat and cracked back against the wall, the pain causing him to drop the knife. He struggled and fought violently, but the Commandant was already so close he couldn't get him away from him. He was buried into his chest- just like his dream- where that damn jacket protected him. Reality began to set in, he could smell blood and feel the Commandant shift, grasping his wrists and keep them together in a single massive hand behind Helix's back. If he managed to get him bound that was it. Helix turned his head, looking at Derek with wildly fearful eyes. He felt the Commandant bind them together, his fate becoming clearer by the moment. He could hear his breathing, it hardly even sounded elevated, like he had gone so easy on Helix it was like walking. Helix tipped his head back, sounding like a wounded wolf tucked into a corner. He howled and snarled, bit and threw kicks if he thought he could. Slowly, the men regrouped, staying well away from the Commandant trapping the vicious boy to the wall. No one wanted him to turn on them. Helix looked at Derek again.

    “D-Derek, d-don't let him do this!” He looked down, then to Helix, trying to smile.

    “Think of it as an adventure, Helix. I'll be with you the whole time. It'll be... Fun.” It sounded so damn lack luster that it could have been funny in another situation, instead Helix just shook, betrayal crossed his face.

    “W-what?” He asked softly. “You... Did this on purpose?” Derek looked at him,

    “Yeah, kid. I did. After he busted your side I decided enough was enough. We all know you wouldn't have stopped until he hurt you enough to put you down, or kill you. He tends to have a hard time between the two.” Derek laughed a little. “You did good, though. Gave his bell a ring.” A skippy inhale brought his attention down to the kid pinned to the wall by the Commandant. His head fell back against the stone behind him, tears splattering onto his chest as the Commandant righted himself, placing a hand onto Helix's shoulder. It felt too heavy, too controlling to be friendly.

    “You will be safe with us.”

    “Safe?" He whispered. "You’re not funny." Helix grit his teeth, closing his eyes tightly. He shouldn't have bothered Giles. He should have just shot himself. He would have saved everyone a lot of trouble. He should have just cut his throat. 

“Helix-” Helix shuttered at his name on the Commandant's tongue. That feeling, the same as the one when they first locked eyes, the feeling of being _stared_ down. “I do hope to change your mind on Lord Lucien and I. I have no intent of letting you go any time soon, for any reason.” Helix knew he tried to mean well- Well as he could mean, but it made him flinch, looking over at Derek. He wouldn't look at him. Helix closed his eyes, listening to a wind-chime hum as the breeze blew by. “I apologize, but I believe you should be asleep for travel. Your wounds will bother you.” Helix didn't get a chance to plead to be awake, all he heard was a solid thud and his ears ring. The void followed like clockwork.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Going to be some tough times ahead, hopefully good guy Derek will pull his head out of his ass. I hope the Commandant comes across creepy enough. His charisma is so damn low lmao. Gotta make up for those other stats somewhere.
> 
> But seriously, Commandant, please roundhouse me.


	7. Play The Part

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Helix is sad, and makes himself sadder thinking about his position and what is happening. Don't worry buddy, I hurt my own feelings, too.  
> Enjoy!

* * *

 Gray. Black. Red. Orange.

    He tried to force his awareness to the surface and open his eyes but all he saw was slivers of things and people passing. It felt like an eternity that he was unaware of the things that they could be doing to him. He felt the flickers of emotions and the eyes on him. He thought he heard the pats on the backs and the short cheers almost to say, 'Holy shit, we got a hero!' Black, jet black, the Commandant's jacket probably. The off black of the uniforms that Derek and the rest of the officers wore. A familiar scent brought his eyes open, breathing out hard and regretting it. He flinched, pressing his hand to his side. If I'm a hero, I'll suck Lucien's dick!

   The hazy film vanished after a moment of just blinking and breathing. He realized that he was in the second BrightWood tower, on the third floor. He could see the fourth small landing above him. The books and the apothecary equipment was a comfort that he didn't ever think of being thankful for before. His head fell back against the lumpy jacket haphazardly rolled up under his head like a pillow. Well, he was living the high life! He exhaled gently, shaking his head. He should be grateful, but he just didn't have the energy for something that full of shit. The Commandant had fucking laced into him. Perhaps he didn't mean it, he was happy he didn't break in half, but he just couldn't wrap his head around this. Him seeing Helix like that and deciding that it was a good idea to continue, to corner him. To escape he would have to bide some time in order to get as many people as he could over to his side, heal, and learn a way to put the Commandant down in a single, swift act. Those shards seemed like a good target. He rolled his head to the side, noticing that his bag sat right on the top, looking untouched.

    “Please, don't be a decoy.” Helix mumbled, rolling up and jumping at the sound of metal. He looked down before he even moved and noticed a shackle on his left wrist. The type that Giles use to use on massive, dangerous prisoners that have the strength to get out of normal bonds. He bet that the person who did it had a good chuckle. He looked around, locking his eyes on the strange metal decor Garth had hung above the bed.

   Helix reached up, picking off a small metal piece that was a bit thicker than a pin. He pressed it into the keyhole, slowly taking the shape of the chamber and then pressing back in and jiggling it gently. The mechanism popped when he managed to lift the lock enough. He pulled it off his wrist and rubbed gently. Thank you, Dad. Thank you. He stood, slowly inching his way over to the bag, kneeling down. He listened to a couple of grunts talk about something to do with Bower Lake down the wooden steps. He opened his bag, rifling through quickly. He tugged out the seal with a bright smile. The Commandant must not have been the one to do this, because he would have taken it and probably been here to question him when he woke up. He pulled out the false bottom, taking the butterfly knife, the key to his garage out back, a large sum of his money, and a single C4 charge. Money talks, if nothing else he could change minds with that. The butterfly knife was a nice bartering tool too, it was reliable and pretty. But it was also deadly, and in Helix's hands, deadier. The C4 could kill the Commandant, most likely. At least put him down. And the seal was his connection to the people that would, hopefully, save his life. It made him feel far more safe than moments before. Helix placed back the bag and inched over to one of the book cases. He hid his things behind there, careful to keep it looking untouched. He held the seal in his left hand however and stood straight. He steeled himself for this conversation.

    “Dad?” He tried, very quietly.

    “Good lord, Helix, I have been trying to get you for two whole days! Where are you?” He didn't know what to say and eventually his silence was met with a distraught, “Please, no... Where are you!?” He cried again. He swore he could hear the crashing of him trying to gather everything at once. 'Right under your nose.' Helix thought.

    “Dad.” He tried to soothe him, “If you come here, they will slaughter you.”

    “I will bring the whole God damned Bower Stone guard!”

    “Sit on that.” Helix mumbled. “I have to get better first to be any help. The Commandant clocked me pretty good. I will hide the seal and try to keep you up to date. Keep the guard in mind, I don't know when or how any of this will go. There are a few weapons that I finished up stairs in the house. There are blueprints and directions. Get use to them, they'll come in handy.” Helix shifted, trying not to sound horribly sad. “I'm sorry.”

    “Helix.” He flinched, expecting a verbal beat down.

    “Y-yes?”

    “I love you.” In that moment, safety held him tight. He fought sobbing and trying to run down stairs and attempt escape. Childish it may be, he wanted his father so badly his head was in agony.

    “I love you, too.” Helix rasped. “I gotta go.” He placed down the seal as well, turning and jumping at the sound of someone coming up the stairs. He flinched as he sort of threw himself down, putting his arm in the general area of the shackle, because he just didn't have the time to lock it. He stilled and watched just a hand snag the bag, and then they returned back down the stairs. He panted shallowly, wincing and clipped the 'key' onto his boxers, under his pants. He locked himself just in time to hear someone else start up the stairs. Please, don't be the Commandant. They both looked at each other in a shocked way.

    “Good morning, kiddo. I can't believe you're awake.” Helix was cautious but he didn't seem dangerous. “I'm your medic, name's Garret.”

    “H-Hello.” He replied shortly, nervously.

    “Don't mean to be rude, but you're not going anywhere, so.” He unlocked Helix's hand with a key and slipped it back into his white coat jacket, left side. Good to know. “Can you stand, son?” Helix's eyes flicked up at his smiling face. He wanted to hate this man for his gentle nature, but something told him that he could be a friend. He stood, shaky at best, but he was standing. It took a lot more than he was willing to admit to steal back his belongings. “Good, that's probably the best news all day. If you couldn't have stood we would have had a much harder road.” Helix looked up at him, watching his face shift. He definitely had a kid at some point, he knew that look. “Can I see your side, son?”

    “T-Thanks for asking.”

    “You strike me the type that really appreciates that.” Helix lifted his shirt, looking at the dark purple and blue, a little yellow. It looked like a child finger painted his side. He almost wanted to laugh. “Honestly, kiddo, I'm just going to treat you like he did break a rib, because I'll be damned if I don't think he did. That being said, no heavy lifting, I'm sure you're going to have time and the means to heal.” Helix dropped his shirt, nodding. “Alright, normal stuff. What's your full name?”

    “Helix Eli Stayer.”

    “How old are ya', son?”

    “Nineteen.”

    “And how much do you weigh, about?”

    “130 pounds.” He nodded, unspooling a measuring roll. He stepped on the bottom and held it up to Helix's head. “Five foot, four. Have all your teeth?” It seemed robotic and yet Garret did often tried to meet his eyes and was certainly listening.

    “Y-yes, sir.”

    “Lots of lean muscle to you, good. That will keep your rib cage in place better.” He shifted, placing down the roll and looking down at Helix. “Going to touch your head. Don't be offended.” Helix felt him part his hair in different places. “Is this natural, Helix? It's real bright.” Helix glanced up through his platinum hair.

    “M-My brother got all the color in the family. Two extremes.”

    “Midnight black, I figured then.” Helix nodded, looking up fully. “Hold up.”

    “W-What?”

    “Look at me again.” Helix did, nervously. “Well I'll be damned, heterochromia!” Helix must have looked unsure. “Two different eye colors.”

    “Oh, that's the name of it.” Garret looked his face over, he could feel him look at his right eye, see him look over the break between the top half of crystalline blue and the forest green underside. His other eye was just the pretty green so he wasn't surprised when he looked but didn't linger like the other eye.

    “Well, I'll be damned. Cool, I've only ever seen that twice before you. You take care of yourself, which is good. Anytime you get injured it's easier to keep yourself up if you already care.” Helix flinched a bit as he pat his head. “And no lice, so you get to keep your hair.”

    “I'd fight you tooth and nail if you tried to cut it anyway.”

    “I'll remember that.” He replied, calmly. “Any issue with your jaw?”

    “No. The Commandant only hit my side.”

    “What about your eyes?”

    “I'm okay.”

    “How does your stomach feel?”

    “I'm hungry and thirsty but okay otherwise.” Garret nodded a few times.

    “You've been out for a while, I'll be sure to get you something. You've been talking, so you're not in extreme pain, hopefully?

    “I'm alright, nothing terrible. Hurts more when I inhale hard or twist.”

    “Sounds right.” He nodded. “That will be an issue until you heal.” He sighed, watching Helix sit on the desk near by. “Mentally, how are you doing?” Helix couldn't help the deep sigh that left him, as he put his head back in regret. “Not good.”

    “I've been chased down like a rabid animal, kicked and shackled. And now, I'm going to be held prisoner until I'm deemed worthless and then slaughtered.”

    “Yeah, Derek told me a bit about you. What he could get out anyway.”

    “Yeah, I bet he knows it all.” Helix rasped, curling his fingers into the wood under him.

    “You're angry with him.” Helix looked up at Garret as he placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Now, I know getting into other people's business isn't well thought of, but let me tell you something, okay?” Helix nodded. “Derek is crushed, son. Just like you seem to be. I don't know how to say it pretty like, but he feels the weight of what he did. I just hope you can forgive him because he likes you, Helix. He just didn't know what to do. None of us did.” Helix paused, looking up at him. Garret had been one of the men behind the Commandant, that didn't engage him. He let him ruffle his hair. “I think we all admire you, Helix.”

    “Wish I just died.” He whispered. It would have been easier, right?

    “You're lucky you didn't.” Helix flinched, frowning. “It would have been slow, even if you did it right. Then they both would have been on you, trying to keep you alive. That would have been far more traumatic for you. And I can almost guarantee the Commandant _would_ have kept you alive.” Garret looked thoughtful for a moment. “We all do what we have to, to stay alive. Though I will warn you there are men here that enjoy what they do. For now, Helix, I'm going to mark you as safe to be alone. Someone constantly guarding you would only make you worse, am I wrong?”

    “No, you're right.” Helix mumbled.

    “If that changes, you are to tell me, understand?”

    “Sir.”

    “Alright, good. I'm going to go get you some food and water. Stay here, I'm not chaining you. You won't get away with your side, sorry kid.” He turned, taking his clipboard he wrote all his information on and disappeared down the stairs. Helix froze at the sharp shutter of unease that rushed through him. Leaning against the stone he gazed over the balcony and wondered where Derek was. He must have been out over a day and already they had this place turned into a genuine army outpost.

    Small fires and tents lined any area that was clear enough, some lines hung for laundry and he could tell a huge tent was the mess hall. He stood, looking down toward the garage. Thankfully, it tapered out and the garage looked untouched. If there was nothing else to be thankful for it would be that. He turned, a short yip of pained surprise leaving him as he looked right into the Commandant's chest and punched him right in the side. Fucking jacket!

    “Ah! Ow!” His back rammed into the stone and he held his hand to his chest. He hunched a bit to try and ease his pain in his side.

    “Why are you not tethered down?” Helix tried to control his breathing, righting himself and holding his back tighter to the wall as the Commandant stepped over him. He flinched, expecting a beating. When he wasn't harmed, he stuttered out.

    “G-Garret checked me over. He was going to go get me some food and water.”

    “He left you untied?” He pressed. In that moment he realized he didn't have any weapons on him and he didn't possess the ability to flee like he had been. He had to face this now, he didn't have a choice. A strong wash of heat crashed over him like a waterfall and all he could do was pretend that this was normal.

    “My side is to damaged for me to run, and even then I didn't get away before.” He tried. It seemed to work as the Commandant held out his hand.

    “Let me see your hand.” Helix thought about arguing, but he relented. He placed his palm under his hand, looking it over. He could feel the thick, calloused fingers. The Commandant's hands where icy, but not as chilling as his dream. It extended to his palms, as well. If he was anyone else Helix would be tempted to grab his wrist to see if he was still cold there too. “The last thing I need to be doing is harming you further.” His hand pulled away from under his and he could feel the massive talons brush over his skin. Helix recoiled a bit, putting his arm down against his side.

    “C-Could you step back a bit?” Helix tried. The Commandant looked down at him and then took a single, large step back. Helix rounded the table, thankful for not being pinned anymore. Helix watched the Commandant follow him just enough to keep close. He sat up onto a different desk, not really having much of a choice, but at the very least he could chuck a book at his head if he had to. He watched the bigger man cross his hands behind his back and stand at ease. He seemed to be thinking of what to say. It would almost be funny if he didn't feel so trapped.

    “You are not alone.” The Commandant stated. Helix narrowed his eyes, trying to understand what he wanted from him. A few times before Blade had sent Boof after him to follow his scent and find him. If he got caught by the army, he knew that dog was smart enough to act harmless. But God knows if the person wouldn't just outright kill him.

    “Boof?” Helix asked, nervously. He knew it was a stupid name but it was cute. The Commandant cocked an eyebrow. “B- My dog.” The Commandant straightened up and shook his head.

    “No, Helix. I am talking about the grand scale of things. Other heroes.” Helix smiled a bit and was unable to help his bitter response,

    “Don't make me laugh, it hurts.” Other heroes. Not alone. Helix decided to try and appeal to the Commandant for the first time. “Commandant, look.” He sighed, looking at him. He was shocked that the Commandant gave him his full attention. “I know you're trying really hard to please Lucien, I get that.” He did. “But you saw my guns and you're making a mistake. I don't have fancy linage. I have a dead drunk father, and my mother died in childbirth, with nothing to her name either. I'm real sorry, I wish I could give you what you want. But it's not me.”

    “Though your guns are incredibly impressive, Helix, I can tell you cannot see your own prowess. It is you who controls those guns. You, are a hero.” He grit his teeth.

    “If I had these so called heroes with me, if I wasn't so _fucking_ alone, then they would have protected me from you!” Helix snapped. “I wouldn't be here! We would have taken you down as a team! As heroes should.” Helix's hand gripped the desk, his knuckles snow white. Why didn't we? Yes, the Commandant was terrifying but why didn't they all join him? Why didn't they protect him? If it was all of us, we could have done it. Right? “Instead I ended up running from you like a maniac and I get punted for it.” He could see the Commandant tighten up at the mention of hurting Helix. “Derek was the first thing I've had close to a friend.” Helix said, smiling a bit. Sure, Hammer was a cool friend but he knew she only knew him because of his ties with Blade. She would have never passed him even a glance without him. So it was true, on his own, Derek was the first to show some interest in being friends. And that smarts, maybe Helix didn't make it easy but it never seemed anyone had the time. He didn't either, anymore. “So no, Commandant. I'm alone.” He didn't think he would get away with this, but it was a good idea to have that thought lingering in the Commandant's head that he was just an innocent kid. He looked up at him when he huffed. He sounded almost appalled, and he certainly looked it.

    “I refuse to believe that you have no one behind you.”

    “Has anyone tried to break in here?” The Commandant looked extremely annoyed, but it wasn't directed toward him. “Has anyone asked if money would get me out?” Helix looked at his palm. “Has anyone even asked where I am?” He fought real tears, other than his father, he was sure nothing was crossing anyone's mind. “It's obvious it doesn't matter.” He placed his feet on the chair, looking at the Commandant. “What else do you want?”

    “Perhaps we can become your-” Helix looked up at him, trying to slaughter with just a molten stare. “Of course, that is probably not your first thought.” Helix rubbed his hand, wishing that this was over. “I cannot just take your word, Helix.” Helix shrugged.

    “Fine. I'd take your test for fun anyway. What do I do?”

    “You will have to come to the Spire-”

    “No.” Helix snarled. “You'll kill me, no one that goes there comes back.”

    “I am not going to kill you. I am not going to harm you any further than I already have if I can help it.” The way that he said it seemed genuine, it frightened him. Why did he want to be so gentle with him? “But first I must find Garth.”

    “Who is that?” Helix asked. He was happy with his lie, it sounded so genuine. Then again, at this point Garth would probably do the same to Helix's name.

    “He is the hero of Will. I wish to make sure I have at least a hero. Simply put, I know he is a hero and you are adamant that you are not. I need to capture him, as well.”

    “Weeks? Months?” He hissed.

    “I am unsure.” Helix put his hands through his hair. “I know that this is not ideal-” Helix grasped his wrist when he placed his hand on his shoulder. “I know that I injured you, and I plan to atone for that. I am sure you will grow to like the army being around. Including I. You will certainly not be alone any longer.”

    “You better hope I do.” Helix snarled, pulling his hand off and looking at it. For a moment, many people flickered in front of him. None of them other than Kartheus where as stupidly kind to Helix, and that _powerful_. No one would ever beat him and Giles for the love they showed Helix. He looked up at the Commandant, meeting those cold white eyes that seemed mostly curious currently. His hand was near limp in his grip, clearly not trying to scare him with a tense, ridged one. Helix dropped his arm as he placed it back by his side and continued to stare at Helix like he was something worthwhile.

    This man, he was trying his hardest to match that kindness in his own way. Why? To think that the Commandant would be so merciful and kind, it made him want to gag. Blade was meant to be like this, not a homicidal tyrant. And lord knows about Lucien, what if he was like this? There was something about this that seemed far to genuine for comfort. It almost made it worse that the Commandant seemed like he to _wanted_ to be friends, not needed. He didn't have to be nice to Helix or play this game. All he needed was him alive if he was a hero. That's why, Helix guessed, that he was so uneased with this. Something told him that if he didn't want to do something, he didn't. This wasn't a game, then. It was real. And that terrified him.

    “What have you been through, Helix?” Helix looked up at him, knowing that look. He knew that the Commandant had to have been through Hell to be where he was. Even just the will shard procedure. The look his eyes cast over him now was pity, and Helix wasn't prideful. I've been through enough, give me the damn pity.

    “I have been tortured, I have been deprived of food and water, I have been beaten, whipped, fingers broken, and shackled far before you. I've been through most of the wretched things you can think of. And I am sick of people ruining my life for me. I can do it on my own.” The Commandant lifted his hand, watching Helix close his eyes quickly. He brushed his fingers behind his ear other than his thumb. He ran it over his heated cheek. Helix was so thrown off by the touch that he leaned into the gentle hand just because it was merciful. The cautious way that his thumb touched his face just enough to leave a brush of coolness. His claw sent a shiver down his body that made his toes curl tightly. The way his head tipped just slightly and he seemed to smile at the way Helix was giving into his touch. He seemed all to pleased with his...  _Submission._

    “From now on if someone harms you, you are to tell me.” It didn't have the snap of command and was spoken softly, but it certainly wasn't debatable. His voice also had a shocking amount of possessiveness lurking just under the surface. Followed swiftly by a sinful desire from Helix for just a bit more. Helix shoved his hand off before he stepped closer, seemingly going to embrace Helix into his chest. He cowered away and kept his head down in a full flinch, to hide the dusting of color that even reached his ears.

    “Commandant, what are you doing here?” Garret asked, walking up the stairs.

    “I was simply speaking with Helix, no harm done.” He turned, walking toward Garret. Helix inched over to the edge of the table, keeping his head down still. Avo damn you, Commandant! You know I'm desperate for someone that would like me, and you're going to use it against me now! Fuck, I shouldn't talk like that, it should be hard for him to pull me apart! Helix tried to promise himself that he wouldn't let him touch him again. He was easy to win over sometimes, and physical affection was no help. That was why Helix only allowed Giles to hug him, it overrode things that people did and made forgiveness seem real easy. He knew it was sad, but he was so damn touched starved, and now it would be worse without Giles in his life. And the Commandant knew that.

    “Helix?” Helix looked up at Garret.

    “Mm?”

    “Wanna eat?”

    “Please.” He wandered over, stealing the plate and eating quickly. Garret and the Commandant spoke with each other, but he never really listened. He polished that quickly, wiping his face and taking a swig of water.

    “Good?” Helix held up a thumb. “Believe it or not, Derek's best friend is the cook. His name is Mikel.”

    “Tell him, nice shoes.” Helix stated softly, feeling a tad better after eating.

    “W-What?” Garret asked, laughing slightly.

    “Send my compliments to the chef.” The Commandant chuckled as Garret looked at him like he was insane.

    “Witty, little one. I like that.” The Commandant placed his hand on Helix's head for a moment, surprising him into being still. “I will see you tomorrow morning, Helix. Try and sleep well.” He pulled away, turning and nodding at Garret before the click of his boots vanished into the white noise. Garret sighed, shaking his head.

    “Someone will bring you breakfast, I don't know if it will be him or someone else. Need anything?” Helix shook his head, laying carefully to not bother his side. “Sorry.” He cuffed his arm. Helix shrugged.

    “Garret...”

    “Yeah?”

    “Thank you.” He smiled softly, leaning over and rubbed Helix's head.

    “Have a good night's sleep, Helix. If you need anything, the guard downstairs is Stefan, okay?”

    “Thank.”

    “Yeah, you're fading.” Helix hummed, closing his eyes. There was a strange sense of reality that washed back over Helix, but it was too late. His exhaustion won out and he was carried into a restless slumber.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't think I was going to write in him going for physical affection that early but I was drunk and I wanted. And besides, if you're this far in your in it for the stupid bullshit I write. Which, thank you! I'd be fluster too, Helix.


	8. The Game Begins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aggression and Depression go hand in hand! Introduced to a lot here. Underlined text is another language being spoken.  
> Hope you enjoy!

“Mornin', Sunshine.” Helix exhaled against the skin of his arm, tucking his face under it more. He could feel the coolness of the morning drafting into the tower. “I've been late all morning, so honestly? I completely feel ya'. But you gotta get up.”

“I can't even sleep in?” Helix mumbled, forcing himself to sit up slowly. His heat was lost and he couldn't help being annoyed immediately. He had a hard time keeping his eyes open and keep his teeth from chattering.

“We run a tight ship.”

“We're on land.” The guard began laughing softly, nodding.

“Alright, alright you're not a morning person.” Helix looked up at him, watching his hand brush over his buzzed head. His bright honey brown eyes were full of unspoken sarcasm and a bunch of shit. His face curled into an amused grin and he seemed like a nice guy. He could be a friend, too. If Helix didn't lose his patience. He was about Blade's height, six foot two inches, give or take. “Come on, let's hit the bricks.” Helix pushed himself up and stumbled, huffing softly. He looked up at the officer and he nodded down at him. “Good job.” Helix was tempted to bark a fake laugh just to make a point. He followed him down and out of the tower. They turned the corner and began walking toward the back. More cream colored tents had been put up since Helix was awake last and a few grunts nodded to them in greeting. Fires licked the morning sky and a couple officers sat around them talking and eating. Down by the river there was a couple more milling about and hanging around a small wood plank shelter. “Sorry I was late, bud. I would have taken you to the hot springs but this is all we can do this morning. Just a warning, it's colder than Hell.”

“Wake up.” He mumbled, trying to keep himself in check.

“There you go.” Helix looked up at the janky way that they had set up the shower and fought laughing. Fuck it, right? It works. There was a “pipe” that was attached to the cliff, they probably had a real fun time driving stakes into the ground and rock. It was angled so that the top was filled with water from the fall. And it just rained down. Constantly into the small shoddy shelter they built. At least there was one. Helix rubbed his face, giggling softly, the little things. “That there redneck engineering.” Helix looked at him. He was starting to become more aware of his surroundings and remember the situation he was in. His rage calmed, replaced with questions.

“Stefan?”

“Yeah, that's me.” He looked at Helix. “The Commandant's second Sergeant, Derek being the first.”

“How many?”

“Sergeants? Five. Derek, me, Jeff, Hyde, and Brick.” He replied as they stepped off the stone path toward the river.

“Hyde?” He asked, probably sounding nervous.

“He's a dick, but for the right reasons. He oversees the convicts and other riff raff that we get. Damn good at his job, good at keeping the soldiers square and healthy, but he's a bitter bastard. Kinda the type you expect from the army, ya know? Came from Rock Ridge.”

“Brick?”

“The only man that is almost as tall as the Commandant that I've ever met. Massive guy with a real good heart, he's just a bit young in the brain.” Helix flinched a bit at the wording but, yeah sure, he could have said it way worse. “He's from Bright Wood. Need something moved? Ask Brick. Want to have fun? Ask Brick.”

“Jeff.”

“Sharp as a damn knife, socially brilliant, you know the type. Says all the things other people want to hear, sort of like a spokesmen for the Spire. Came from Fairfax Gardens. Not as good in a fight as much as he thinks he is. Has an ego but if you play his game you'll be fine.”

“Derek.” Stefan gave him a short look but continued,

“He's been the Commandant's right hand for years. In brute strength, Brick has him beat but if you need to survive something you want Derek. Years of experience and years of experience with the Commandant. No one knows the big guy more than Lucien and Derek. Under that jokester exterior is a really good dude. He tries to hard sometimes.” In Helix's foggy mind he wondered if that was true. Did Derek really know the Commandant? Did the Commandant really know Derek? Or was it something like Blade and Helix where it was just a show piece. He looked over at Stefan.

“You.”

“I'm from Old Town, just like Derek. I oversee prisoners and their care, and the men too. Hard sometimes.” Helix nodded, he was sure it was. “So we will be buddies until the Commandant tells me to fuck off.” Helix snorted softly. “Fun fact about me, I am almost always late. Just count on it.”

“How are you alive?” Helix mumbled.

“At this point the Commandant just sighs and tells me not to do it again, every time.” Helix smiled a little. They were almost there, as Helix asked,

“Hierarchy?”

“Recruits, grunts, officers, sergeants, captains, the Commandant, Lucien.”

“Captains?”

“The ones that went through the shard procedure and lived, like the Commandant. They tend to be a lot worse in my experience. Don't know how they let that ball roll away so fast.” So the Commandant was the best and the first? Odd.

“The Commandant.” Helix tried. Stefan paused in thought, turning his head and barking,

“Oi! He's gotta go first.”

“Stefan!” The officer whined.

“You can wait, you whiny bitch.”

“Running on Eastie time!” Another grunt called to Stefan. He sighed.

“Commandant, yeah? He works his ass off, trying his best to keep this army together. I think the biggest thing about his success is that he is flexible. He learns fast and he's certainly not stupid to begin with. He can see right through most people. Though I will say that doesn't mean he knows what to do with that. He has a hard time… interacting with people. But, it takes twelve, which is all of the Captains to man the Spire when he's away. He's been in war before, but I don't know when or where. Derek is the best person to ask about him.” He shook his head, glaring at the man that was going to go into the Shower before Helix. “Sometimes it feels like Sergeants up only have brains.”

“My feelings, man.”

“Yeah, yeah. Timber.” He chuckled a towel at Helix that actually almost took him over in surprise. Helix righted himself and punched him in the gut. “Yup... Nice job, sport.” Helix turned, quickly washing up because the water was like ice on his skin and with no way to control the pressure it sort of hurt. He was certainly clean. He stepped out to the side with his towel on him as Stefan followed, turning his back and covering him from anyone there.

"Thanks."

"I got you figured out already, tatter." Helix smiled sadly at the nickname. It was cute, he shouldn't be invested in these people. He looked up as he handed stuff back to him. He quickly pulled his shirt on, the sleeves sticking to his damp arms as he hopped to get his slacks on. He clipped the key for the shackle onto his new boxers with as much graceful sneakiness he could muster and retied his boots carefully to keep his socks dry. He tied his hair up into a haphazard pony and shook out, putting the long sleeves around his fingers.

“Okay.”

“Fantastic.” He stated without a hint of excitement. It made that sad smile grow just a hair. “The Commandant has been bitching this whole time.”

“I never heard him.” Stefan pointed up toward the Tower where the Commandant was clearly pacing back and forth. You could feel the annoyance dripping off his form. It immediately fired Helix right back up. If you are so important then just let Stefan deal with me.

“Whinge, whinge, whinge.” Stefan muttered as they walked back up toward the Tower.

"I'd rather not deal with this.” Stefan began laughing, nodding. About that. Helix looked up as the Commandant turned to them, walking closer.

“Eastie.” Helix realized that was his last name. It was so funny that honestly it overloaded him and he didn't laugh. He didn't have the energy to cackle. “I was wondering if you took him to the springs.” Stefan shrugged a bit, then saluted him, his hand facing outward from his forehead. Placed similarly to a USA salute. “You shrug, then salute?” His tone wasn’t playful.

“I'm late, what can I say?” The Commandant sighed. “Besides, the kid kicked my ass. It took me a while.” They both looked at him. Helix stared up at them. The top of Stefan's head just met where the Commandant's neck began. Helix wasn't sure of the numbers, but Stefan was right. The Commandant was the tallest man he could think of. He wasn't jacked, however. It was clear he was an army man, he was not as muscular as even Blade but something told him he was far more dangerous. Maybe it was just the way his body held his muscle, or maybe it was his training. He knew the Commandant could toss around a human man like it was nothing and his sword was a claymore. It made sense that his diet and workout regimen was probably meticulous. His eyes flicked up to his face. The expression he wore was one of concern, probably because Helix wasn't speaking back to them.

“Sorry.” Stefan snorted loudly.

“You.” The Commandant hissed, looking down at Stefan.

“Yeah, boss?'

“Time management, learn it.” He looked pretty pissed. Probably because Helix was involved. Maybe he thought it was embarrassing?

“Will do, Boss.”

“Thank you, Stefan, dismissed.”

“Later, tatter.” He stated to Helix. Helix raised his hand in a quick wave. He looked back up at the Commandant and narrowed his eyes.

“What do you need?”

“Good morning, Helix. Would you like to have something to eat?”

“Yeah. Sure.”

“Come along.” Helix chased after his coat tails. His stride was full but tempered, his hands curled behind his back, the left one holding under the right. Helix looked at them, watching the claws that ripped that man's face off glimmer in the morning sun. They were not the extreme length Helix thought but they were sharpened into a perfect point and clearly well cared for. The base of them where a darkened blue, turning to the normal white right at the very tip.

“Stop stirring it-”

“It's got lumps.” Helix's head raised. Was that Derek's voice? “Isn't it meant to be lump free?” It was. Was he ready for this? Did it really matter if he was or wasn't? He would be forced to forgive him no matter what. He  was one of the few men Helix knew would turn if he tried hard enough. He didn't have a choice, they were friends whether Helix forgave him or not.

“No, it's pancake batter!” Helix watched the Commandant shake his head, stopping at ease across the way so Helix could stand where he wanted to.

"You assistance is lacking.” The Commandant scolded, gaining an annoyed look from Derek. 

"At least I'm not bothering you." Derek replied, low and dejected. 

"He doesn't deserve it." He could see the Commandant look at him out of the corner of his eye. He ignored him.

"Haha, burn." Derek mumbled, then whipped around. "Helix!" 

"Hi." He tried. He knew he sounded tense, but he didn't have any reason to make him less wary. This was a situation that he would genuinely rather die than be in.

"Helix?" Helix looked up at another man that was working on the ranges, cooking away. He was a little taller than Helix, with soft strawberry hair in an undercut, bright blue eyes looking at him like he was mystical. He had to be the closest person to his age he had met so far.

"Mikel?" Helix guessed. 

"H-how did you know?" He looked genuinely freaked out. Yeah, cause I'm _terrifying_.

"Garret." He replied shortly. 

"Oh-oh, yeah! Cool. I'm the head cook. If you need anything, lemme know."

"Thanks." 

"Helix, are you good?" He looked at Derek, processing. No. He wasn't. He was hungry and he was having a hard time standing without leaning on something.

"Hungry. Tired." Helix rasped. "I want my father." It slipped out, Derek and Mikel looked nervous, the kind of nervous people get when you mention dead relatives with tears in your eyes. 

"You look real pale, kid." Derek tried. "How's your pain?" Helix didn't reply, just fought keeping his eyes open and clutching the hem of his shirt with his hand not on the table. "You should see Garret." Derek was starting to sound scared. Helix's fingers tried to dig into the smooth surface under his hand.

"I'm fine."

"You aren't fine." Derek stated. "Here, let me help." 

"Get away from me." He spit, stepping back into what felt like a wall. "I just want to eat. Why is this hard?" A hand was placed onto his shoulder, attempting to comfort.

"Helix." He grasped a plate under his hand and shattered it across the Commandant's face. Mikel screamed shortly, and Derek jumped between them. It didn't seem to hurt him much, or if it did he didn’t show it. It just surprised the hell out of him. He looked at Helix like he was completely belligerent. He guessed he was.

"I. Said. Don't. Touch. Me. What is so HARD for you to understand about that? Do I have to speak another language?" Helix grit his teeth. "Useless bastard." His Auroran roots showed through. He remembered the first time Kartheus said that in front of him. It just seemed so powerful. It seemed he did it justice because the Commandant's eyes locked on him in a bewildered way. Though Helix couldn't tell if it was because he got his bearings or if it was the fact that he spoke Auroran. 

"What did you say?" 

"Racist, too?" 

"I speak it, Helix." A painful shutter shot through him. He hadn't heard anyone other than Giles speak it in years. Most people didn't speak Auroran due to the racism they experienced. Helix wanted nothing more than to kill this wretched fuck. Every time he turned around it seemed like the Commandant would out smart him. That he would always be in this man's shadow, always a step behind.

"U S E L E S S B A S T A R D." He spelled out. "Do you need me to say it in another language, too?"

"You are out of hand, Helix." His tone was gentle, he kept using his name like it would snap him back into place. Out of hand? OUT OF HAND? 

"I hate you." Helix ground out, at this point he was probably going to shatter his jaw. "You hear me, you stupid bastard? I HATE YOU!" The Commandant stood straighter, his expression was one of true duress. Like he was actually hurt by the words that Helix screamed. Like his opinions fucking mattered. Derek and Mikel both looked at odds, neither seemed to understand the exact words, but they knew they certainly weren't friendly. The air felt frozen in place and tasted stale. Mikel inched back, seeming to be extremely frightened by anything that moved. Derek held out his hand toward Helix.

"Hey, hey. Come back to me Helix, he's not going to hurt you again." He didn't realize that maybe that was a huge problem for him. That he was hiding all these creeping emotions in attempts to keep everyone around him happy. So maybe he wouldn’t get punted again. All this pain and the man that caused it was standing right next to him pretending to be friendly. Calm down, play the part. But he couldn’t. "Alright, alright, let's breath for a minute." Derek soothed. The Commandant didn't seem to want to stay another second. Helix didn't know if it was for his safety or for the Commandant's own prerogative.

"Derek. You are to ensure he eats, gets to Garret and returns to his bed. If you leave him alone he is to be shackled to the bed. Do you understand me completely?"

"Yeah. I got it."

"Good day to you three. I will check on you later, Helix." He turned on his heel and marched out far faster than when Helix had been following him. The air was dripping with the bitter taste of Will power. Currents ran through the air but as soon as they were there, they vanished. Helix panted weakly, his breath showing up against the brutal air. It felt like tiny crystals where attaching to the inside of his lungs.

"Sit." Derek whispered, pushing a chair over near Helix. He was worn out, so he simply did as told, holding his side and rocking gently. "Here, Helix." He ate quietly but slower than molasses, not bothering either of them for anything. "Helix." He knelt by him. "Talk to me."

"I don't know what you want me to say." He rasped passed a mouthful.

"I know you're angry, and I know you're hurt but I'm begging you to not to fight him like this. It will stop you from escaping far faster. You're just injuring yourself."

"Derek!" Mikel gasped. 

"I'm not letting him rot here." He glared back at him. "Don't act like he deserves this."

"He doesn't, but trying to help him escape is a huge undertaking."

"Doesn't matter. This is too much for a kid. If that doesn't prove it I don't know what will." Mikel was silent. "Doesn't matter if you join or not. I just need you to keep your nervous mouth shut."

"Y-yeah, of course." 

"I trust ya', so don't fuck me." Mikel nodded, he didn’t seem like a snitch, just piss scared of his own shadow. Helix finished eating, nodding. 

"Garret." 

"Do you want me to carry you?" 

"No." Helix stood slowly, leaning on the counter. "Yes." 

"I got you." He picked him up carefully and walked back up through the road. He turned into a larger tent that smelled like disinfectant and blood. He wanted to gag. "Garret." He turned from working on stitches on a man. 

"How is he doing?" 

"In a lot of pain." 

"Alright, I'll be right there." Derek laid him down on a clean cot, brushing his hair out of his face. Helix rolled onto his good side and whimpered quietly. 

"You're okay." Derek whispered, petting his hair. 

"That's a hard decline." Garret stated, walking up to them.

"I don't think he realized it but he turned real hard when he whacked the Commandant."

"He what?"

"He smashed a plate on his jaw." Garret sighed. 

"Helix-" He watched the young man look up at him with tears rolling down his face slowly. Garret grit his teeth and exhaled sharply. He looked intoxicated in the worst way. He grasped a small blanket, covering Helix and rubbing his head. He looked like a cowering child. Wasn’t he? Garret shut his eyes and asked very softly, "Are you allergic to any meds?"

“Nn.” He already seemed out of it.

"Okay. I'm going to give you a shot of pain killers and you're going to stay with me until you stabilize, sound good?" Helix just hid his face. "Okay. I'll be right back." Derek resumed his gentle petting. He couldn’t really be mad at the Commandant, he seemed to handle this with as much grace as he could. But there was no way that he would blame Helix for being aggressive. There was so much that went into that situation that he was surprised Helix didn’t refuse to go in, talk to people, or even leave his bed. He was allowing himself to be put through social torture, that was the worst he could come up with. But fuck, how was he going to call the kettle black? The kid was just trying to survive, to do what he was guessing was ‘right.’

He wasn’t sure who to have a conversation with, the Commandant? And tell him that he has to listen to what Helix says when he sets a boundary. Or Helix? And tell him that he needs to set his boundaries hard, and not budge. But he also understood that Helix was injured after being chased over Hell’s half acre. He probably didn’t think any boundary he set would ever be heard, no less acted on. Both, he would have to talk to them both when they were level headed and not doped up. He was told often he had a good heart, and he was thankful for that. But he was not meant for this type of situation. It melted his brain and made him just want to laugh awkwardly and move on. Once he became the middle man and someone depended on him it made him extremely uncomfortable. He just wanted everyone happy, and when he couldn’t get that it drove him mad. At least he was getting a work out in an area that he needed to grow in, right? 

“Derek.” His head snapped up. “Are you alright?” Garret asked. 

“Y-yeah, fine, just stressed out a bit.” 

“I know. This is certainly not easy.” Garret hit Helix dead on and emptied the syringe into his arm. He tossed it, sighing softly. “I never thought that I would really care when we got a hero. I thought it would be business as usual and that I could just wave off the idea that they didn’t want to be there.” Garret shook his head. “But I don’t like this. I won’t after Helix is gone, either. It is almost colder to think of someone like Garth, who would just be silent. Completely at ease with the fact that he can’t get away. Even though I know he’s screaming in his head like Helix is outside. I know now. I suppose I wish I was still ignorant.” 

“You’re making me upset, man.” Derek huffed, rubbing his face in attempts to not look like he was wiping away tears. 

“Sorry, sorry. I think we both need a vacation.” Derek nodded a few times, a tiny chuckle leaving him. 

“God, I would kill for a bottle of whiskey.” 

“Mm, gin.” It was a thoughtful sound before he declared that his choice was better.

“Wussy.” 

“Gin is so much cleaner, it doesn’t taste like the inside of an acid bath.” 

“You don’t like shooting, you like to sip.” 

“Yes, and you like getting raging drunk.” 

“Damn right, if I’m going to do it, I’m doing it right.” Garret shook his head, sighing. 

“I’ve heard that Farmer Giles makes some mean moonshine. But you didn’t hear it from me.” He handed Derek a small bag of gold. 

“Halfsies?” 

“Please.” 

“Moonshine I can work with. Gin, not so much.” 

“Whine elsewhere, Derek. I have Helix for now.” 

“Thanks, Doc.” 

“Anytime. Bring Mikel and Stefan if you can.” 

“Will do.” Derek stood, pocketing the gold and brushing his hand over Helix’s head. “See you later, kiddo.” Helix reached out, as Derek caught his hand, giving it a tiny squeeze. “It’s alright, Garret is right here.” He let go, turning around and walking out quickly, in desperate need of a moment where he wasn’t put together. He stood on the far side of the tent and rubbed his head, shaking it violently. He exhaled so hard it sounded like a hiss and turned, walking out of the encampment. He didn’t have it in him to go back and try to play friendly with his men. He was going to get that moonshine and set up a nice little cove for Mikel, Garret, Stefan and himself. Get drunker than Hell and maybe cry like a little bitch. Whatever happens in the man-cave stays there. He turned out of the road for the Tower and locked his sights on the growing farm just visible in the distance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really sad, actually. I'm kinda using my experience when I was in the hospital for Helix right now, so I hope it comes off as genuine as I was when it happened looool. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed and the next two chapters will be split in two and follow Derek going to say Hello to Giles and Helix and the Commandant. They will be marked well. I'm sure Giles will love! to see Derek.


	9. Aged Bourbon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [9.A] Sorry it's a little short but I decided to do something last minute. Hints at addiction issues. This is the chapter with Giles and Derek.

Derek kicked a few bright leaves out of his way as he followed the path up closer to the farm. From the last time he saw it it looked in disrepair. He looked at the ground, watching the leaves sit over the rich soil, undisturbed. The weeds were beginning to overtake the crop that seemed to be yellowing. Why in the world was he letting that happen? Was he not here? He wandered up to the door and could smell a mix of gun powder and alcohol. Gods, he might just save this man’s life. He wrapped a few times on the wooden door. A gun was shoved into his face as the door pulled open. He startled, eyes wide and raised his hands out of habit. 

"What do you want, boy?" The older black man hissed. 

"Giles?" Derek tried. His eyes focused on him, so he knew that it was him.

"What. Do you want?" He repeated. 

"I-I heard you make moonshine. I was interested in some, and I'm willing to pay high for your… inconvenience." Giles dropped the gun, watching him for an awkward amount of time. 

"Fine. Come in." He turned letting Derek walk passed him. It looked like the front lines in the home, furniture was shifted into places it clearly hadn’t been, clothing everywhere and some packed away. There were weapons on nearly every counter surface and all of them looked fancy and expensive. "Sorry for the gun, son. It's hard to tell bandits apart from normal people sometimes."

"I know what you're saying…" Derek whispered, looking down. His heart skipped a harsh beat. One of the guns Giles had looked very similar to the powerful handgun Helix owned and that the Commandant had in his possession now. He turned away, toward Giles to ignore its shiny casing. 

"Looks like you're getting ready for war." He stated, jokingly.

"I am." He replied, walking into the side room. Derek followed him, his stomach began to turn over itself. "I've got a few different types. Cranberry which is real dry. Just straight shine, blueberry which is good for mixed drinks and-" Giles paused. "Cotton Candy." Derek had never heard that, but he knew Mikel would like that. 

"Cotton Candy? That sounds real neat." 

"It is. My son made it." Derek was trying not to sweat. There's no way. The Gods wouldn’t do this to him. He had been through enough, right?

"Cotton Candy and a Cranberry if that's okay?" 

"More money for me." Giles stated, standing and looking at him. "You look pale." It sounded accusatory. Get it together, D. You’re fucked if he finds out, he’ll never listen to you if you say you’re friends with the kid. If you were friends you would have saved him.

"Nah, just… it sounded like… your son died." He rushed out, rubbing his neck. "Sorry, I’m no good with this." 

"He's been kidnapped." Derek's eyes widened. "Lucien's army has decided he is a hero, and the real heroes that are his so called friends will do nothing to save him." He handed over the jars, not noticing the shake to Derek's hands. “I’m going to tear that army into shreds.”

“Heroes?” He rasped, “Like-” 

“Yes. The real deal.”  Giles turned around, lighting a cigar and exhaling heavily and coughing. “God damned things.”

“How many are there? Is it like the olden days?” Giles seemed to sneer.

“No. There are three, all useless.” He hissed. Derek knew he was taking advantage of a distraught man that needed help- He couldn’t do it right now. He didn’t have proof that he and Helix were going to work together to escape. But three heroes, that wasn’t right. If Helix was the third, why was there- The fourth. The one that Lucien tried to kill along with his sister, Rose. Derek shifted, placing down the jars and pulling out a fat sack of gold. It was probably around eight hundred, certainly no less. Considering that Knothole island's liquor was around three hundred a bottle, he figured that this was fair. He was going to need money more than Derek would in order to keep himself afloat. It was clear that he didn’t give a shit about the farm right now, which Derek understood fully.

“Eight hundred, fair?” 

“More than.” Giles took it, chucking it onto the table near that handgun. “Do you know anything about that army?” He looked at Derek who tried to keep himself calm. It’s okay, he’s a friend. There is no reason for you to be scared, he’s going to help. Soon.

“I know that you need friends if you want to take on an army, Giles.” 

“I have many friends in many places. And in fact, I worked closely with Lucien. I did not mind him, we got along fine. But I do not know how to contact him. I do not know what to do other than burn them to the ground to get my son back.” Derek didn’t either. For now, Derek needed to keep him close at hand and try to find out a way to explain to Helix that they needed to work together after what he did. And keep his poor guilt ridden father from doing anything to kill himself. “Anything else?” 

“I know that they are based out of West Cliff. But I don’t think you should go that way.” 

“I am more capable than you think.” Derek shook his head.

“I’m not saying your not. I’m saying that maybe you should give him some time. If he’s like you, then he’ll get out himself probably, right?” Giles snarked. Derek was trying hard to keep him from hunting the army. If he was caught- 

“You did not hear the fear in his voice, boy. You did not see what just a week of running from that monster did to him.” Derek grit his teeth. I did see. I played a part in it. And you have no idea how much I want to beg for you and him to forgive me for it.

“I’m sorry, Giles. I am. But I bet you they took him to the Spire and to be fair, you aren’t getting in there without another army and then some.” 

“At least someone is.” Derek hesitated but grasped his shoulder and smiled a tad.

“You want me to come back and help you out with the farm?” 

“No, once he escapes or once I manage to find him-” He’s right under your nose, but you can’t know that. That place is already a stronghold. You will die, no matter who or what you bring. “He and I are getting on a boat and leaving Albion.”

“Well, if you don’t mind, maybe expect me again. If you don’t have any shine, I could just visit.” Giles looked at him. Though he looked hardened and angry, there was just barely a wetness to his eyes.

“He’d like you.” 

“I sure hope he would.” Derek replied softly. His heart was pounding in his throat, maybe even in his skull with his throbbing brain.

“Get out of here. I have things to do.” He gave Giles a little bit of a squeeze to the shoulder, and nodded.

“You got it.” Derek turned on his heel as he picked up the jars, walking out of the house and shutting the door. It took him a lot of time to get back to the Tower, as his mind raced a mile a minute but his feet scuffed over the dirt and leafs. So much needed to be done, and it all felt like it had to be now. He knew the Commandant went to try and catch one of the other heroes. If he got another one, then he would certainly call the Great Shard and take Helix to the Spire. He knew the Commandant wouldn’t harm him, but he wasn’t going to let him go. And if he wasn’t going to let them go, he had to kill him. And from everything that he had seen, all he had been through, the Commandant was going to be one of the hardest men all of them have ever tried to kill. Especially if he caught wind that they were trying to take Helix away. Something told him he would become a completely different person once that hand was dealt. They had to put him down before they even tried to leave. He would have to kill one of his closest friends for years. He thought about Helix, about Giles and about how this was going. Maybe there would be a way to change the Commandant’s mind. Maybe they could all be friends, especially with Helix’s pull for uniting people. But for now, he grounded himself in the idea that he would kill the Commandant if he had to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Giles, Derek... I love you so, but I also love hurting my characters. Suffer. <3 The other half of this will be posted tomorrow. Thanks a bunch for reading! If you have anything you might wanna see or anything lemme know! I'm actually really enjoying this lol.


	10. Tell me Where it Hurts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [9.B] I'm real proud of this one. I like how Helix and the Commandant both come across. Apologies for the last chapter being so short and disjointed but I hope I make it up with this one and the idea I have later on. :>
> 
> TWS: Talk of depression, suicidal ideation and a look into how Helix values everyone else's life over his own. I use Romani instead of G*psy seeing as it is a slur. There is also misogynistic language toward the end, and talk of not nice things happening to Reaver. What a shame.

Helix’s fingers dropped off Derek’s wrist like shedding water. It smacked the cot heavily as he shook and struggled to lift it again. He forced his eyes open with every ounce of will he had. The light filtering through the tent walls hurt. He was desperate to fight. He had to get away from this place. He felt his efforts dying, replaced with exhaustion he didn't have the heart to feel. The last thing he wanted to do was to slip under. _This was the time_. No one else was there, Garret was busy. But the room began to swim, ringing in his ears drowning out the sounds of the camp. Strange lines mimicked spiders web drifting toward him, his vision gradually began to darken. He closed them in alarm, mimicking a child hiding under a blanket. The cot felt like the most heavenly thing he had ever touched.

The next thing he knew someone was touching the side of his neck. His eyes snapped open and the tent was lit with small torches, the tree frogs singing sweetly outside. Helix lifted his hand, clutching to their wrist with everything he had. Even though he tried it seemed like his hand was just sitting on their skin. The smell of disinfectant and blood still lingered from before. He must have looked desperate because Garret recoiled a bit, but not enough to pull on him.  

“It’s just me, son. It’s me. I was wondering why your pulse jumped.” His hand hit the fabric of his own shirt and he curled it into his chest near his jawline. “How are you feeling, Helix?” 

“It hurts.” He choked out. 

“You hurt yourself more when you twisted.”

“Doesn’t matter.” He didn’t want to sound like a brat, but why where they wasting drugs on him that would help someone else? They were going to kill him soon anyway. He could hear men back towards the tower playing dice and fires crackling. He could hear a few men in the ICU whine and groan.

“Helix, it does. You need to stop trying to sack yourself." ‘I’m done letting you die for nothing.’

“What do I do then?” He asked. “What would you do?” Garret looked lost, his face in an uncomfortable frown. Some torch light danced across the far side of his face illuminating his downcast eyes. He shifted from his left foot to his right. Helix watched the older man, hoping for some words of wisdom. I don’t want to die, but I do. I don’t deserve the advice, but please give it to me anyway.

“I wouldn’t be doing this.” No wisdom was found. Helix knew the moment he struck the Commandant that he had made a massive mistake.

“I’m sorry.” Garret looked at him like he was taken aback. Helix looked down at the cot, fighting tears and hiccups. “I’m sorry.” What else could he be?

“Helix, I’m not-” 

“Garret! Get your ass out here, I got an officer down.” His voice cut right through the iron rich air. He didn’t recognize it but he felt like he could place it. It sounded like someone that knew they had authority. Garret shook his head, trying to undo the damage that he didn’t do. Helix did this to himself. This was his fault. 

“I’m not mad at you, Helix. I am mad **for** you.” He placed his head down onto his arm under him, not replying and running his fingers over the cot for comfort. “I-”

“Garret!” 

“Cool it, Hyde!” He barked, turning with an uncomfortable contortion to his face. Surely it was easier to do that than explain to Helix what he felt. It wasn’t like Helix could explain his own emotions. He didn’t blame the medic. He didn’t really deserve that grace, anyway.

The ground crunched under someone’s boots, that heavy step that commanded attention. The exact person he didn't want to see stopped and stood over him. Concerned caution was rest across his entire being but he didn’t make the mistake of getting too close.

“You are awake.” Helix simply put his head back down, tucking his face into his other arm in front of his face. Do whatever you want, I deserve it. I shouldn’t have acted like that. I shouldn’t have broke. He was silent for a moment before turning and grasping a chair, sitting arms length from him. Close to him but not nearly as alarming as touching him. Besides, he could see him fully now and that helped put Helix at ease. He noticed that his jacket was different from before, it looked like the one he had met him in. His sword was actually on his back for once, probably because he knew he would visit Helix and sit. He wondered if he was going somewhere and why.

It seemed like he wanted to take away his own position of power, because for the first time he was just shorter than Helix. He was grateful, even if the Commandant didn’t realize it. 

“Your ferocity worries me, Helix.” Helix didn’t even want to reply. It felt worthless. Yes, he was being aggressive. Yeah, he would like to return to Blade but it wasn’t that one thing he was fighting for. Yes, he lied about his father being alive but he just so utterly vulnerable. He was a nomadic soul that thrived on making his own decisions.

In that respect, he was spoiled. Yes, Blade often bitched when he wasn’t in line with whatever he wanted Helix to do. Helix suffered enough in the beginning of his life that he refused to give his independence up any more than he had. He was so use to a smack or a cold word that it didn’t stop him. Bounty hunting, helping anyone he could, and saving imprisoned people made him feel like he had something to offer to Albion. What a slap in the face. Imprisonment never crossed _his_ mind because he knew he wasn’t a hero. Why would he ever prep for something that just didn’t make sense? 

“‘M a hero.” The Commandant sat back against the chair enough to make it creak. “What you wanna hear, right?” He rasped, “You can leave now. You’ve won.” You’ve won, now please just kick me around and get it over with. I hate it when Blade sits there and stares at me while I try to figure out what I did wrong. I hate guessing.

“It is not about winning, Helix.” He raised his eyes, looking at the Commandant oddly. Quietly, he asked,

“Then what’s it for?” 

“The greater good of Albion, to bring a golden age. To stop all that senseless violence we have been through. Cease the death of those who do not deserve it.” Helix went to argue with him. 

Then the thought of Theresa egging Rose and Blade on to get that music box jumped at him like a tiger. Putting them right in front of Lucien’s loaded gun. A desperate man hoping anything would bring back his family and in a fit of irony, slaughtering those in his way to stop death. How Theresa raised Blade to be angry and seek vengeance for the sake of Rose’s name. Because he couldn’t be someone empathetic and caring, that just wasn’t enough. That he was doing the greater good to protect Albion from Lucien by slaughtering everyone, just like Lucien. How Hammer’s father died needlessly to turn her to their side. So much easier than talking to her, force a reason to fight, not give one. How Garth abandoned him the moment he could.

How things had to be done in the most destructive way possible to keep everything and everyone in check with Theresa's motives. This was never about Blade nor Rose. This was about what Theresa wanted and how she would meet her goals using dead children. She was no better than Lucien, but Lucien was no better than her, either. Reality refused to sink in, he felt wretched. A tiny whimper slipped from him. In his epiphany he didn't realize the Commandant reached out for him, but retracted his hand before he touched him.

“Then the Spire will wipe out the world again, because there is not a single thing here that is worthwhile.” He whispered through his confusion. Brutally bitter, even the air tasted sour.

“You cannot fool me, Helix. You are a hopeful person, you want to see the best in everyone. Derek is a prime example. You gave him your trust when you certainly did not have any reason to. And I can see that you are attempting to forgive him now. I am sure darkness is not all you see.” 

"It's not darkness, its worthless.” He spit. Darkness had a purpose.

“Your dog would not like to hear you call him worthless, I am sure.” 

“He's probably gone.” Not mine, Blade's. He always wanted a dog, but never got one. There was a great amount of things that he sacrificed for the sake of others. All for ungrateful people that couldn’t even help him when he truly needed it.

“You know that is not true.”  Helix lifted his head a bit. His pupils were dilated and he looked completely wrecked from the medication. Pain wreaked havoc on his entire demeanor and even his ability to keep eye contact. The Commandant’s hand shifted but he settled, sitting forward a bit with his hands locked together, his forearms on his knees.

“This place is bleak. It’s miserable. I don’t understand how you can see anything worth fixing here. It’s not a fixer-upper, this is ash after a fire.” 

“I have quite a few years experience on sitting with my misery, Helix. Far more than you have.” Helix looked at his own hand, refusing eye contact. “I know that perhaps my looks deceive, but I have taken abuse that I have not returned. I have met with people on my path that have used me to my full extent and then left me for dead. I was not always a man who could protect himself. Even now, there are times that I find myself surprised by what other people can do, even if no one can see me react. To put it simply, if I went through the will shard procedure for nothing then I would not have survived it. Even someone as brutal, cold, and ruthless as I continues for something. I know, at the very least, if you are given something positive you would begin to believe. Even if you have nothing now.” 

“I _am_ nothing. I don’t know why you think I’m a hero.” It struck him in a dark humor kind of way. If he was a hero he would have been treated better. He was too weak, too short, and he did not possess enough talent to attract attention. He couldn't be a hero. He was fodder, chaff.

“I cannot believe that you see yourself that way. If I was honest with you, I wish to shake you every time you say something like that.” He wanted to apologize for it, but he bet that would annoy him too. He was surprised the Commandant hadn’t already given up. He seemed like the type of man that wouldn’t like someone fighting back against him.

“I've been shown this over and over, I'm not saying it because it's fun. Am I meant to believe the never ending times others have told me and shown me? Or am I just meant to hope they're wrong?” 

“They have no idea what they speak of. They seek only to spread misery. You know people do that well, with your thoughts roaming your head like that.” 

“Don’t flip the shit I say onto me. You’re not my mentor.” The Commandant sat up straight and became far more stern with him for a moment. Not mean, but it had bite to it.

“How will I ever challenge your thinking if I do not? You must be challenged in order to grow.” 

“I don’t want to be challenged. I am not yours to challenge.” He leaned closer.

“Yes, you are.” Helix tensed at the tone, glaring at the cot’s mattress under him. It felt strange when the Commandant did things like that. It left a lingering, tingling feeling that was very dubious if it was positive or negative, and yet it was _interesting_. The Commandant raised his shoulders, tossing his hand into the air and then returning it. “You are too good to let stagnate, you must learn whether you like it or not. Life continues on without your permission, Helix. You are here, and you are _not_ leaving." Again, the possessive twist on his words made Helix slump down with his warm face in the crook of his arm. Briefly, it made him forget that he wanted to leave. "A different perspective is that you are smart enough to learn something through this, even if you are not a hero.” Helix glanced up at him, narrowing his eyes at the man sitting with him. “Regardless of what you choose to do;” Helix watched him sigh. “I must collar you. After today I know all too well that you are dangerous even when you are heavily wounded.” Helix grit his teeth, regretting his brash nature when injured. He understood his own survival instincts but he cursed his lack of control. “I apologize, but I wished to do it when you could understand me fully. So now is the time.” 

He reached for Helix. He grasped the collar, which was textured like a leather choker and looked like one to. He tugged it right from his hand. They both looked at each other as Helix tucked it under his body and laid on it. For a moment there was quiet, stillness. The white noise of the camp filled in the air that they had been taking up. The Commandant made no move to grab at it, or harm Helix for what he had done. They just shared a moment of looking at each other. It started to settle in that maybe he could use the Commandant’s opinion of him to his advantage. Or at the very least, he wouldn’t get thrashed for just existing. The Commandant wasn't someone Helix thought was easy to fool, so he would use it very carefully at first. 

“W-What collar?” He tried, a nervous smile on his face. He got a response that he never would have expected. The Commandant dropped his head, though Helix swore he saw him smirk before he could. It was only a moment but he lifted that normal steel gaze with something sparkling in his eyes.

“I should not be encouraging this.” His voice was taunt with humor. Helix felt a swell of pride, his heart skipping.

“Is that a smile, Commandant?” He smiled at him in a rather uncontrolled moment.

“I do not smile." Sarcasm dripped from his words and his facial expression. He was starting to learn that the Commandant was extremely animated for someone that wore a mask. You just had to look closely, and mix it with his frequent use of body language.

“Too tough?” Helix asked. His fear subsided for a moment and he semi rolled onto his back. “Okay, yeah. Get this.” He leaned even closer, maybe even shifting to the edge of his chair. His gaze locked on him and again he gave Helix his undivided attention. This one always got Kartheus. “Where do you send a kid that wants to learn to how to make ice cream?” The Commandant gave it a few moments of thought.

“I do not know.” 

“Sundae schoooool.” Helix’s delivery was probably a part in it too, as he did jazz hands pathetically and smiled weakly. The Commandant turned his head away. His eyes slipped closed and his nails dug into his jacket. He watched him shake his head at himself. “They have a summer camp too.” He looked at Helix out of the corner of his eye, a mistake. “It's the cherry on top.” Finger guns. The Commandant quietly snorted, turning back toward him. A smile brought out his crows feet and eased his stone expression.

“I have not heard that one. I like it.” The Commandant looked wistful for a moment. He lifted two fingers, continuing, “Two fish swim upstream. One runs into a concrete wall. He turns to the other and says, ‘Dam.’” And dropped his hand. Helix giggled rather uncontrollably. Regardless of it all, it was worth it to hear the Commandant tell him a pun. And no less rather flaccidly, which made it funnier to Helix. It was clear the Commandant was cautious still with showing him emotion, but he was trying. If nothing else, he could tell that to someone on his deathbed. 

“Ow. It hurts.” He squeaked. 

“Apologies, I did not think that through.” His eyebrows raised a bit, watching Helix flinch.

“No, it was good.” Helix leaned his head onto his arm and muttered, “Are you here all night?” Not thinking of it could be taken askew. 

“If you wish me to be.” Helix swallowed at the genuine and swift reply. He picked up the collar, looking it over. Just looked like your average ‘Gothic’ choker. “It will pacify you with Will if you get away, or if you become too aggressive again. That is it.” Helix huffed, placing it around his own throat and locking it. He really didn’t want anyone else putting something like that on him. Startled when it sealed and settled to fit him just right. He placed his head back down. 

“Commandant?” He looked over at Garret, he looked extremely concerned and has a needle 'hidden' in his hand. It was probably full of the medication he gave Helix earlier. He couldn't see Garret injecting the Commandant, so he shifted slightly in unrest.

“Yes, Garret?” The Commandant didn't seem to be affected in the slightest.

“Uh…” He looked between them. “Didn’t he hit you with a plate?” 

“Yes?” It seemed like it was something so normal to do, the Commandant didn’t pay it much attention. It made Helix feel a tiny bit better about an action he was regretting. Like he understood why Helix did it. Damn his naive ass for investing in these people. It would only come back to haunt him. And yet here he was making mistake after mistake. 

"Do you want me to check you over?"

"I am fine." The Commandant brushed him off, almost seeming annoyed that he was interrupting his conversation with the person that assaulted him earlier.

“You’re not screaming at each other?” 

“I’m going to kick his ass, just gotta get up.” Helix mumbled. 

“I am waiting patiently.” 

“I’m the patient here.” Lame, SO LAME. The Commandant chuckled deeply, but cut it short by clearing his throat. It seemed like their sense of humor was similar; absolute garbage puns.

“You know, something tells me that after a bit you two will get along just fine.” Garret turned and left as Helix wondered just what he meant. Because they were both strange? The humor? Why?

“So… What happens now?” He asked quietly. The Commandant looked to the creme colored wall, watching the flames cast shadows on it from deeper in the camp.

“Whatever you wish, Helix. You may explore and take use of anything in the encampment, but you are not to leave Brightwood Tower unless you are with someone. And you are not to leave Bright Wood without me, or my express permission.” 

“G-Good to know, but I mean the whole… Waiting game.” 

“Do you feel well enough to have an extended talk?” Helix sat up carefully, sighing. He knocked his hair out of his face and rubbed under his jaw. There was a small space between Helix's foot and the Commandant’s leg. He almost wanted to put his foot on his knee to see what he would do. However, he was not that brave yet.

“I suppose I better be.” The Commandant pulled out his lapel, reaching into his jacket and pulling out the guild seal Helix had been carrying for years. He looked from it to Helix, who didn’t seem to know what to say. “That sucks.” The Commandant smiled again, placing it on his far leg. 

“So it does.” He motioned with his head toward the seal, “Tell me about the other heroes.” 

“No idea what you’re talking about.” 

“Hammer had much to say to me. A vicious young lady for once being a monk. She claims that you both are indeed friends.” Helix laughed sarcastically, a wince flicking over him.

“My statement stands, if I had people that cared for me, I wouldn’t be here.” The Commandant nodded once. 

“I agree with you. Wholeheartedly, in fact. But Garth is a coward and likely influencing her.” Helix shook his head, 

“You know more than me, probably.” 

“With Garth, perhaps.” 

“Hammer hates Lucien’s army because of her father’s death.” 

“Yes, that fool was far to out of hand. I should have went myself. A mistake I was not going to let happen again.” 

“You were overzealous, too.” He stated gently. The Commandant locked his eyes on Helix again, not bothered by the prod.

“I expected Garth. Not you.” 

“What is different about me?” The Commandant continued to stare up at him. There was something that bolted across his body. He didn’t say anything for a long moment.

“You are simply different.” It felt like the truth.

“There’s more to it than that.” Helix accused. 

“No, not really.” His eyes curved happily. “I like you. I detest Garth.” Helix chuffed, unable to help a bit of a laugh. 

“What happened with Garth?” 

“He has hated me since I became ‘augmented.’ He thinks that I am a freak. He has never liked me for the short time we have known each other. Then again I have never liked him, either.” Helix shrugged a bit. 

“Not really his place to judge your ‘change.’” 

“He thinks that every single living thing is his to judge. And he will make sure you know his opinion if you want it or not. And I often told him that I did not much care for it. I suppose that alienated him from me.” Helix nodded a few times, letting his mind wander. Suddenly, that dream surged to Helix’s mind. 

“Did… You have black hair? That you would braid?” The Commandant raised his head sharply, his eyes searching his face for a reason why Helix would ask that. “S-Sorry-” 

“Why do you ask?” Helix didn’t reply, unsure if it was a wise idea to tell him that he dreamed of him. Whether it was good or bad. "Black yes. I never had it long enough to braid.” 

“Is there a significance of a braid?” It felt right to ask. The Commandant’s nails dug right into his jacket, his entire body at attention as he stared at Helix. It wasn’t a glare, but it was certainly something that told him that the Commandant did **not** want to talk about whatever Helix was dredging up. “I’m sorry.” Helix rushed out. “I. Hammer!” Helix spout out. “She’s tough! And- Loved her dad- uh…. Has a giant… Hammer…” Helix smiled a bit, nervously. 

“And you are the third.” 

“Negative.” Helix stated, his mind switching to Reaver. “I am still not a hero.” 

“Helix, do not attempt to pull that still while I hold this.” He waggled the seal. 

“That doesn’t mean anything. I just knew-" Brakes. He is not a friend, put your  head on Stayer. "Hammer since I was young." Helix stated, shrugging in the most gentle way. “I just use it to talk to them.” The Commandant looked baffled. 

“Garth did not tell you about these?” Like Garth would teach me anything in length.

“What is there to tell?” 

“Only heroes use relics like these, they will not react with someone who does not have heroic blood.” 

“I’m not a hero.” Helix was genuine, he didn't know what else to say.

“Yes you are, Helix.” 

“Stop screwing with me, Commandant.” He sounded more nervous then he meant.

“I am not. I swear it.” He tried to soothe him.

“I’m not the third.” Became his mantra from now on.

“You know who it is?” The Commandant shifted, watching him.

“Are you going to beat the shit out of me if I do?” Helix asked softly. He immediately shook his head.

“No one in this encampment will harm you.” 

“Yes, I do know.” 

“And you are not willing to tell me?” 

“Will you let me go?” 

“No.” 

“No.” He nodded, seeming to think it was fair.

“I do not wish to frighten you, Helix. I promise you, I only want the absolute best for you. I did not bring this out to intimidate you, I want you to know what I know. I am a semi-honest man.” Helix smiled a bit at his delivery. He wished that he was, too.

“Semi?”

“No one is perfect.” Yeah, you can say that again. Helix shook his head as his smiling turned into a concerned look.

“Why? I am just… a weak kid.” 

“You will find out soon enough.” 

“That’s foreboding.” He motioned broadly to the camp.

“It does not have to be. I am simply not ready to tell you. And besides, I am at your disposal. I do not think you have to worry for your safety much anymore. And with an army at your feet you are no longer alone."

“M-maybe not." Helix watched him for a moment. He was hoping he didn't have to see what happened if someone raised a hand to him when the Commandant was around. “You remind me of a grizzly.” The thought slipped from his lips. The Commandant cocked an eyebrow, not seeming bothered in the slightest. 

“Is it my height?” Grizzlies do get to about seven to eight foot, sort of laughable. 

“Not what I was thinking. More of how you act.” He tipped his head just slightly, so Helix mumbled, “Territorial. Possessive.” A much different grin slid onto the Commandant’s features. Feral and cunning, just like a bear reaching for a honeycomb. 

“I am a man of simple pleasures.” He felt like maybe that wasn’t true. “I do what Lord Lucien requests, I attempt to govern my men fairly, I do what I think is right and at the end of the day, Helix? What I see as mine _, is mine_.” It felt like everything on him stopped. He swore he would have to crack his fist to his own chest to get his heart going again. He watched the Commandant look up at him. His gaze pierced through him. It made him shutter and squirm. “Those who have challenged me have all died. I have triumphed over them, and I will continue to do so. You belong with someone who can give you the world and boundless knowledge. You belong right here.” He pointed at the ground in front of him, were Helix was sitting. "Beside me." Helix wiggled his toes, gripping the cot. His ears were red again, as he tried desperately not to disassociate into the stars. He shouldn't feel good about this. Something swirled in the back of his head. It whispered that it wanted to see how far the Commandant would go to keep him safe. Keep him _happy._  

“R-Right. O-of course.” Helix fumbled out, deciding to change the subject he brought upon himself. “Hammer said a bunch of shit to you?” His gaze did not change, though his face relaxed from that crazed grin. It seemed like he wanted to continue that conversation, but let it slide. Something about how the Commandant looked at him made him feel exposed. It wasn’t fatherly, but it wasn’t like Helix was a toy. It left him reeling.

“So she did. In her tirade I am hoping that she gave herself away more than she thought.” Helix looked surprised. “I do believe she is hiding in that Romani camp in Bower Lake.” Helix felt a pin prick of fear that gushed over him like heat rash. Good Avo Hammer, get away from there. If he goes up Hero Hill, they’re **all** so fucked. He’ll walk through that Cullis gate and find Theresa, Hammer, and maybe even Garth. “Speaking of that, I must leave now if I hope to intercept her. Garret will ensure that you are alright. Make sure to take care not to harm your side any further. And do try not to glass anyone while I am gone, please?” Helix couldn’t help the panicky:

“I’m sorry.” He winced a bit as the Commandant reached up as he stood, scratching behind his ear with his nails gently. That… actually feels really nice- He righted himself from leaning into his hand, looking at the tent wall. “Be nice to those people in the camp. They’ve saved my life a few times.” It was all he could really do to try and keep him from slaughtering anyone in his way.

“I will hopefully do better than I have with you.” Helix didn’t know what else to say, so he nodded. “I will speak to you later, Helix. Have a good night.” He spun on his heel, walking away. He wished that he had that seal now. Gods, Hammer, I hope you aren’t anywhere near there. He will pursue you until you drop if he even thinks it’s you. Helix got up slowly, wandering out into the main part of the tent and grabbing a bottled water that was in a small bucket for patients. He was dying. He wondered if it wasn't the medication that was doing it. He took a drink, tuning into a conversation that mentioned Reaver’s name suddenly; why? Of all the times-

“Can’t believe it, man. Some stupid bitch managed to kill that pirate fucker. He never died from anything before! Now he has bit it because of some jealous whore. Wonder what happened to all his money?” 

“Dunno man, I don’t believe it’s him.” 

“That chard ass **male** skeleton had **THAT** gun- Dragonstomper .48? Even that fucking thing alone was worth a million! There was no way that he would let that burn. He was known for that gun. Only six of 'um made. I think Lord Lucien has one, too.” 

“It can’t be, I won’t believe that was what killed him! He knew that pistol would seal the deal so he let it go.” Helix was pretty sure he had more than one anyway. 

“For being 'stupid,' she did it right. She walked right in there while he was sleeping and poured white gas everywhere! Lit the place up. It was like a damn bomb, blew up half the damn block. No one survived in the mansion. Not him, her, or the guy Reaver was sleeping with. And of course they had a couple people from houses nearby dusted. The ultimate crime of passion.” Helix swore he could hear him make some type of eccentric facial expression.

“You should write a novel about it, man.” 

“Thanks, dude!” Helix’s eyes widened, as he processed that all and sat back on his cot. Reaver being dead was something he doubted severely because of the Shadow Court. But doing that made questions bubble up. For some reason Reaver created a house fire of the century to... escape? To go into hiding? To get away from someone, or himself even? Was it because he found out he was the third and just fucked off? That he just didn’t want to deal with it? But if he did that that would screw everyone, no one would win this war. Which Helix wondered if it wasn’t the nicest thing that scum-fuck did for anyone.

 If he was dead though, what would happen to the heroic rights that he had as the third? What about the Shadow Court? Now he _needed_ that seal. He needed to ask Garth about that, tell Hammer to run- And yet the Commandant was already gone. He could try to get someone to take him to Giles but he didn’t trust anyone other than Derek and even then, he walked off earlier to do his job. There wasn’t anyway that he could walk around this entire place and find him quietly. Asking for him would be too obvious that he wanted specifically him for some reason. It would raise questions that Helix didn’t know how to answer correctly. And even then, he couldn't guarantee that Derek would be on board. And without a guarantee he would only be jeopardizing them all further. 

He laid down slowly, trying to accept that he was here, that he wasn’t going anywhere. That here wasn’t much he could do about it. Nor could he do anything about the fact that he couldn’t stop the Commandant from trying to find Garth and Hammer. Perhaps he could slow him down, but he would have to be willing to act his ass off and follow through, meaning spending time with the Commandant to keep him still. Perhaps he would. He just hoped that they were ready for him. He hoped that they didn’t underestimate him, because Helix overestimated him and still lost. Maybe this time around they will work together instead of watching each other get picked off one by one. He closed his eyes, acceptance was the last thing on his mind. Just, go with the flow, right? The Commandant talking about how he belonged beside him played on repeat in his mind. Such sweet words had to be a lie. He brutally rejected them right then and there, over and over. But it simply bubbled back up to be cut down again. He exhaled and hoped that he wasn’t jumping into an eighty foot pool blind and bound.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading! This is sort of taking a turn into a slightly less horrific story, it's gonna be a weird mess but hey, I'm enjoying writing it so I'm just going to go for it. Loving making Helix sweat whenever the Commandant looks at him. It's just so fun lmao.


	11. A Lovely Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a pretty rough chapter, though there are hints of cute and funny stuff it turned darker than I expected.  
> Lots of talk on depression, trust issues, abuse, suicide and just general fuckery like that. Thanks for reading, I worked my arse off on this one!

Helix’s chin tucked into his shoulder as he woke up to the sharp sound of a chainsaw. No one had the key to his garage, and even then they would never be able to figure out his chainsaw without help. No, wait. That’s someone snoring next to him. Helix sighed, smiling while his head rolled side to side. It sounded like a dad, really made you want to just beat them with a pillow while shouting, 'dad, stop!' He stretched to the best of his ability and praised whoever it was for letting him get to sleep before guarding him. He would have fought them if they tried to sleep there before he did. And he would have won. He sat up, running his hands through his hair quickly and searched for the pony. He came up empty handed and simply let his hair flop as it wanted. It was probably pretty flat and dull. He looked up at the source of the racket.

Derek rest in the chair with his left arm sprawled over his chest and his other limp, fingers stretched toward the damp ground. He was slumped so hard his chin was tucked into his chest and his head was against the back of the chair. It looked so uncomfortable that it made Helix wonder why he hadn’t just taken the ground instead. He stood up, wandering closer. Wow. Helix waved his hand as the scent of fresh, strong alcohol that hit him from many steps away. If he was stronger he would move him to the cot but he probably needed to wake up, anyway. He grasped his arm and gave him a gentle jostle. 

“Derek?” 

“Coconuts aren’t nuts.” He mumbled deliriously. Helix smiled, trying to hold back laughter. Wow, he was glad the Commandant wasn’t around.

“Good job, trivia boy. Wake up though.” He jiggled him, whining. “Deeeeerek.” 

“Hm?” He wiggled and pulled himself up all the way, smacking his lips. “I think, therefore I am. God. I need… moisture.” He wondered how toasted he must have gotten because Helix was giggling under his breath. He wandered out, grasping a water bottle and bringing it to him. 

“You are something.” 

“I guess so.” He rasped, taking a swig. “You think I would have learned my limits by now.” 

“Where did you even get it?” Derek froze, choking on the water in his mouth and coughing. 

“F- **Fu** ck.” Helix shifted, meeting Derek’s eyes as he looked at him. “About that.” 

Derek looked Helix over, he was standing pretty good, only favoring his one side a little. He looked his best compared to how he had been through the last week of the chase and the aftermath. His passive face wasn’t full of pain or fear. It was relaxed with a tinge of a smile to his face. He was probably waiting for whatever the hell Derek was going to spout out next. He watched his hair brush over his collar bone, flicking to a piece of black leather that caught his eye. Derek’s eyes snapped shut and all the joking and happiness vanished of the self titled king of smiles. His back cracked against the chair as he tossed his head. He was flooded with so many emotions that it immediately sent a deep ache to the pit of his stomach. He took a deep, slow breath. He refused to barf in front of this poor kid. He had traumatized him enough, hurt him enough. Done stupid shit to him enough. He should have came and gotten Helix yesterday and taken him to Giles the moment he admitted Helix was his son. He should have jumped into action. His fear got the better of him and now they would have to suffer for it. Now they were backed into another corner. What in the Hell was he thinking? 

“Derek?” He tuned in, realizing he had been ignoring Helix’s calls. Finally, he leaned forward and put his face into his hands. He could feel himself shaking. He shattered when Helix placed a hand on his arm. 

“I’ve fucked us. I’ve completely fucked us.” He tensed when Helix hugged him as best he could, rubbing his upper back. 

“Derek, this isn’t your fault.” He fell limp against Helix’s shoulder, trying not to sob. You don’t understand! I could have stopped this TWICE now and you’re trying to forgive me and I keep doing more and more to you! And you’ve never done a single harmful thing to me. You’ve been nothing but a sweet, lost kid and here I am screwing you over with my own ineptitude. He wanted to explain it all to Helix, but it felt like his air was suddenly gone. He struggled to breath through his carrying on and carefully tucked a hand into the small of Helix’s back to pull him closer. He didn’t register Helix tensing, but he scratched his back and whispered, “It’s okay, tiger.” So he looked up at Helix with bloodshot, tear laden eyes. 

“C-Commandant.” Helix looked down at him, “He- Only he can take those off.” Helix nodded once, 

“I kinda figured.” Or a high level Will user, but good luck getting Garth or Blade to come here or anywhere near me.

“I’m sorry, Helix. I just-” There was so much that wanted to come up from him that it was a miracle that he could control his gag reflex. So much to ask, talk about, so much forgiveness he wanted to plead for. Instead, his dumb-ass could only choke out, “Fuck this.” 

“Derek, he collared me because **I** acted out. Not you. Don’t worry, okay? We’ll make it through. You’re alive, I’m alive, and I get to annoy you daily. I’m… Okay.” Derek smiled at him, thankful for the encouragement, for the love. 

Helix wondered if he wasn’t putting up a front for someone who he felt was worse off than he was. Sure, he wanted to forgive Derek, but did he? It left a chalky taste in his mouth if he thought too hard about how he screamed and howled; and how no one stepped forward to stop the Commandant. Helix watched Derek go to speak again, but a soft clearing of a throat got both their attention. They looked over, watching a medic stand there. 

“Hey, Frank.” Derek muttered. His cadence was back, but it was clear that he was distressed. Helix also noticed that the tightness didn’t fade as he spoke. He was wound like a spring. Something was very wrong but Helix just couldn’t piece it together.

“Ya’ right, Derek?” He asked, scratching his jaw. 

“Yeah, yeah. Just a hard night.” 

“Sright, we all do sometimes. Hey, you gots to get some food in ya’.” He motioned to Helix. 

“I got him, Frank.” 

“Works out good. Boys hafa good’en.” 

“Will do.” He finally began to relax once Frank walked away. 

“He seems nice.” Helix tried. Derek nodded, 

“All the medics are good men.” He agreed, as Helix stepped away and let him stand. “Come on, let’s get something to eat and ease the depression.” Helix let himself be semi-amused and followed Derek like a puppy. It was an uncomfortable amount of time before Derek spoke again. “Helix, I gotta ask for your forgiveness.”

“You have it, D.” Derek winced like it hurt to hear what he seemed to need. They turned into the mess hall tent and tried to make a beeline for the kitchen and Mikel.

“There’s more to it-” 

“Deeerek!” Stefan called, dropping his head back to look at him upside down. “I was wondering if you would ever get up.”

“Was with Helix.” He replied, shortly. Looked like he wanted to turn and walk away but a smooth, very aristocratic voice called, 

“Helix?” Helix didn’t want to, but he stopped out of habit. A handsome man stood from the table that Stefan was at. He was sort of too pretty. His hair was in a flip, a deep brown against his bright blue eyes and flawless pale skin. He wasn’t as skinny though he certainly wasn’t built, and he was as tall as Stefan. His features were sharp and dazzling, with high cheekbones that wore a smile and the way he carried himself seemed ethereal. Almost like a puppet. He wore some interesting noble clothing, with a dark blue and gold color scheme. He was certainly a pretty boy. He had a beautiful silver rapier on his left hip that had an intricate guard on it. “You are our third hero, then?” 

“Supposedly.” Helix tried. He really wasn’t ready to be introduced to a bunch of people, but he didn’t have a choice it seemed. He tried his best to be polite but not cordial. “Hello, it’s nice to meet you. I’m Helix Stayer.” 

“Jeff-” I knew it. “Molts.” He bowed in front of him. “Fourth Sergeant of Lord Lucien’s army.” He straightened up, a bright and friendly smile on his face. “It is wonderful to have you join us, young Helix. I am at your disposal.” At least he didn’t call him short. 

“T-Thank you, Jeff. I really appreciate that.” He smiled, turning and walking back to his seat. Another man approached him now, his arms crossed over his chest as he came to stand right over Helix. Helix looked up at him, waiting for his verdict. He knew this game all too well. He wasn’t taller than Stefan but he was taller than Helix. Watching his cold cobalt eyes flick over him, checking all the easily visible injuries. His hair was salt and pepper from what he could see under the hat similar to a beret. His face was clean shaven and pulled into a tight frown. Over his nose there was a sharp grouping of scars that stood out against his naturally tanned skin. It arched over his nose and onto the other side, ending mid cheek. Looked like maybe a Balverine had it’s way with his face. Helix couldn’t tell if he just didn’t like him or the state he was in. He was certainly in good shape, and he wore his Sergeant uniform with pride. An everyday long sword was resting on his back.

“You look like shit, soldier.” He remembered that voice from last night. Helix sighed softly, nodding.

“Thank you, Hyde. I appreciate it.” He looked semi surprised. Jeff and Stefan both began laughing. 

“He had you pegged as the rude one, didn’t he?” Jeff taunted. 

“Shut up, you shit for brains.” Hyde snapped at him. 

“Pig.” Jeff spit back. 

“Chill.” Stefan called. 

“Hi, Stefan.” Helix tried. 

“Hey tatter, what’s going on?” 

“I have. No idea.” Helix stated. 

“Welcome to Lucien’s army!” He called back, smirking. 

“Lord, Lucien.” Hyde corrected him. He looked back down at Helix. “And that’s Sergeant Hyde to you, Stayer.” 

“Sergeant Hyde.” Helix confirmed, nodding. “I was in the medbay last night, so when you called to Garret, I heard you. That’s why I knew your name.” Hyde watched him, looking down at his body rather than his face. 

“What in Sam’s Hell is going on with your food intake, soldier?” He asked, walking around Helix as he seemed to try and figure out anything else he could bark about. Helix inhaled, keeping himself flat, and calm but his arms curled over his chest loosely.

“Getting better after the Commandant punted me.” 

“Come again?” He looked at Helix oddly.

“The Commandant kicked me in the side hard enough to break ribs.” 

“No shit, you are nothing compared to him.” He looked him in the face. “I’m surprised you survived.” 

“I wish I didn’t.” Helix stated, catching him by surprise again. 

“You need more guidance.” 

“I’ll stick to how I am, thanks.” He stated as politely as he could. He could tell Hyde wanted to say more, but he heard something behind him. 

“Is this hero?” Helix turned, looking up. Holy! He really was close to the Commandant’s height though he still came up short. His hair was bright red in tight braids down the back of his head and his eyes a friendly, warm green. For someone who could do a world of damage, Brick looked friendlier than Derek. His skin was dark and pretty just like Giles. He was built like a tank, but seemed to move like he had the energy of a ten year old. Helix wondered if that was why they called him Brick, because he was like a brick house? He hoped it was. As he knelt in front of Helix with a smile, he placed his plate onto the table. A huge war hammer was on his back that sparkled and had details of a bright, polished titanium hilt. He wondered just how much force this man could put out when he needed to. It scared him into hoping he didn’t want a handshake. 

“Hi Brick, I’m Helix.” He looked at Helix as an exact opposite of Hyde. He looked at him like he was incredibly cool. It felt nice to have someone excited to see him for who he was, not a hero. 

“Helix has pretty hair.” Helix flinched from his hand as he brought up and rubbed over his hair. He relaxed, though he was still heavy handed he was nowhere near hurting him. 

“T-Thanks big guy.” Helix tried to keep from stumbling around from the force. “Nice to meet you.” 

“Is good! If Helix needs anything, come to Brick.” 

“Thanks!” Helix chirped, unable to stay sour around him, he seemed like the person to go to if you needed a pick me up. He watched him stand and sit between Stefan and Jeff. 

“So you’re a hero.” Hyde asked. Helix’s desire to avoid contact spiked again. 

“No.” They all looked at him. “I… I’m not, but the Commandant doesn’t want to hear that he’s wasting his time. I’m sure you could ask him to understand better what he is thinking, but I know that I’m not one of the heroes he’s looking for.” Hyde chuffed, narrowing his eyes. 

“You have a disrespect for authority.” He accused. For what, being honest? Doesn’t authority like it when you’re honest? Helix looked down at Stefan, begging for help with his eyes. 

“Hyde, you know I don’t give a damn what you think. Shut up, and leave the child alone.” Hyde uncrossed his arms, giving him a look. “I’ve had enough, Hyde. Sit the fuck down and stop harassing him.” 

“You want a problem, Eastie?” 

“You are the problem, Denair.” Stefan replied, sitting up. Helix was about to ask them not to go at it for his sake but thankfully,

“No problems.” Brick stated with a mouthful. His face never lost the happy twist as he threatened them. “Or Brick will show Helix how strong Brick is right now.” Both of them cooled off because Brick seemed all too excited to show him just how much of a power house he was. The thought of Brick chucking Hyde onto a table forced Helix to smile at him and skitter back over to Derek. 

“Fucking Hyde.” Derek snarled. 

“W-What did I do?” He whispered. 

“You are a prisoner and you told him that you’re not a hero. A hero to him is still a prisoner, but now you’re even farther down the chain. You talked to him as an equal, Helix. That’s how _fucked_ that guy is sometimes. I was hoping he would take to you.” Derek hissed lowly as they walked into the kitchen. “And he won’t listen to us because he is always better than _any_ of us combined. It’s not you, kiddo. It’s him. It’s all him.” Derek made a face, tipping his head quickly and snapping back into place quickly. “And people say that the Commandant has a thing for submission.” Helix couldn’t help a sad smile. 

“Y-yeah. Food?” 

“God, please at this point.” They looked over at Mikel who was working away.

“M-morning, Mikel.” Helix tried, nervous about the last time he saw him and how he acted. He could remember the scream that Mikel had let out. They probably both looked rag tag because Mikel turned to them and lifted his eyebrows a bit. 

“Bad morning?” He soothed. 

“Hyde just yelled at him for existing, you know the drill.” Mikel nodded, looking down at Helix with a shake of his head. 

“He does that to literally everyone.” Helix nodded. “Pancakes?” 

“Pretty please.” Helix mumbled. He looked up, watching the other man work. Anxiety was pooling off him, even if he and Derek didn’t realize it. “Mikel?” 

“What’s up?” He called. Helix swallowed, doubling down on his honesty. Someone would appreciate it some day.

“I’m sorry.” Both snapped to look at him now. “For… Shattering your plate and scaring you. I was… Out of control and very afraid. But I shouldn’t have done that to you. And it won’t happen again. Not in front of you, anyway.” He tried to joke, but it fell flat in his eyes and he flinched. “S-Seriously, I… I really am sorry.”

“Helix…” Mikel was looking at him with an expression that he could only describe as him knowing what Helix was trying to say.   “I know you are scared, and injured, it wasn’t like, unforgivable or anything. I just- You know. I have my own stuff and… I uh, I just get scared, you know? Wrapped up in my own head.” Mikel motioned to his head with his hands, nearly whacking himself with a metal spatula but was blissfully unaware. He and Derek shared a wide eyed glance that he didn’t notice, thankfully. 

“God, do I.” Helix nodded. “Mikel, I swear on my good dad’s grave-” Both him and Derek snorted. “I will not harm you on purpose. Unless you are ruthlessly beating my ass into the ground and at that point I probably deserved it.” They all shared a bit of a laugh. 

“So… Don’t laugh.” Helix tipped his head a bit. “Pinky promise?” He had to be around Helix’s age, because of the terms he used and the way that he looked. Helix nodded, a small smile on his face as he offered his hand with his pinky out. “Neat!” They crossed pinkies and he could feel Mikel relax.  Yeah, he was young. To trusting, just like Helix was, even if they wouldn’t take advantage of each other. Derek, however, was still lost as he looked around at the kitchen like he had never seen it and seemed to see more than what was there. One word answers and distance to anything that was thoughtful brought Helix to touch his arm and gain a startle. “D?” Mikel hummed. 

“Yeah?” 

“What’s wrong?” Mikel beat him to it. It seemed that their relationship was just like what Helix always wanted from Blade. In a way it made him jealous, but in another way, he got them both so, why bother with Blade? Then again, he guessed he wasn’t jealous of them, he was mad at Blade for his inability to love him. Derek looked around, shuttering in a way that told Helix he was fully paranoid, like everything was listening to what he was about to say. He looked at them, and with a dry throat he choked out,

“It feels like all of this is my fault.” 

“It’s not.” Both of them replied at the same time. It felt very real, and they smiled at each other, then at Derek. He looked more concerned with them jumping on him like tigers than how it seemed so genuine.  

“I feel like it’s eating me alive.” 

“Derek.” Helix tried, smiling up at him as he touched his arm. “I promise you that I’m okay. Trust me, when I’m not it obviously rears its head. You did what you had to, and everyone survived because of you. You did well from every standpoint! What happens now is on everyone else that isn’t you, because I know you’ll treat me well. I am thankful you are with me through this.” Derek seemed to relax to that, smiling down at him finally. Those dark amber eyes finally seemed to catch that happy light again. “You big fucking DORK.” Derek barked laughter, as Mikel jiggled him with his arm. 

“Yeah, you dork!” Though a small weight at the back of his neck tugged. Do you really forgive him? Was it out of necessity or was it because he genuinely would like to forgive him, but he just couldn’t yet? It took him time to understand his own emotions, his processing was slow and hard for him to understand. 

“I just-” Derek shook his head, smiling a tiny bit. “I’m just trying to make it out worse than it is, I guess.” 

“No!” Mikel hissed. 

“You have complex emotions that haven’t been figured out, D. You have to process and understand them, and then try to pack them away. Give yourself time, Trivia boy.”

“I like that!” Mikel giggled, “Did you know that flies take off backwards?” The feeling between the three immediately became playful. All the issues melted away.

“What, like butt first?” Derek asked, pulling his mouth to be scrunched to the side with narrow, untrusting eyes. 

“Yeah, like you!” Helix barked, cackling at him. It hurt a bit, but it was worth it to watch Derek pull his face into a jutting out lower lip and big eyes. He was clearly fighting a smile as he turned away from them, turning his head as he placed his pointer finger on his chin. 

“Look at this ass, would you really not put it first?” A cocky grin. 

“A very nice ass, 20/10.” Mikel sang, giving him two thumbs up.

“Helix?” Derek asked, looking at him. He inhaled sharply as he looked down at the ‘okay’ sign resting on his upper thigh that wiggled to catch his eye. “It’s okay.” Helix purred through a sharp smirk. He watched Derek furrow his brow deep and give the tightest, high strung frown he had ever seen him give anyone. 

“Why are you like this?” He asked very softly, but with strain.

“Years of abuse!” Helix chirped. 

“Abuse squad!” Mikel sang. 

“Gang, gang.” Derek nodded, gently punching Helix’s arm. 

“Ohh, ouchie! One thousand years of prison for Derek!” The three of them giggled together, as Mikel gave Derek a look. His eyes held mischief and a cute smile curled his lips with deviance. A tiny bit of a red dusting rest on the bridge of his nose, 

“Your hotcakes-” 

“Why am I not getting a look? Am I not pretty enough?” Helix whined under his breath. 

“Are ready.” Mikel turned to him, smirking devilishly. Helix immediately regretted doing this. Mikel was very cute, and that curl to his lip only made his pretty eyes sparkle brighter. Oh no, don’t be stupid now, Helix. “You know what else is ready?”

“Um!” Helix squeaked, his face burning. Derek snickered at them both. 

“That’s right,” Mikel hummed, leaning closer as Helix’s eyes went wider and he tucked down to make a bunch of double chins. “My as-”

“ASSUMPTIONS!” Derek barked. The three of them broke into laughter like kids over the word ass for the first time. Was this what friends were like? Not a forced connection all because of a common goal? 

“Assume I would love to see you both later!” He stated with a bright grin. Helix was being inducted into their lives? Willingly? Helix smiled brightly, I. Have. Friends? Even if he wasn’t sure about his forgiveness with Derek, it felt so nice to be able to say that he at least _wanted_ to forgive him. He did trust him, even though he felt betrayed in that moment, he could understand Derek’s rational, and very fair thinking. 

“You got it, baby.” Mikel waved him off as Derek winked at him. Helix waved shortly as they wandered out with their plates. “Come on, we can sit at the cool kids' table.” 

“But I’m not that cool.” Derek snorted, but nevertheless Helix did slid up beside Stefan, grinning. 

“Yay, the new kid picked me!” Stefan sung, stretching out. Brick smiled down at Stefan. 

“Stefan is lucky.” 

“I can share.” He smiled up at Brick with a bit of a tongue out. 

“Brick will shove bun into face.” 

“I’ll eat it so…” He shrugged a bit. Helix placed down his plate, watching them happily- 

“Stayer.” Helix snapped to look down at Hyde. 

“Y-yes, sir?” He knew this game all too well, Thanks to his biological dad most men he encountered were a yes, sir unless they tell him not to or that it was glaringly obvious that the person wouldn’t like it. Someone like Derek, or Brick. 

“Why are you not in taking protein?” Helix glanced down at the pancakes. Helix sucked his lips into his mouth and flattened his mouth tightly… 

“I… Like. Pancakes?” Helix tried, desperate not to set the other man off again. 

“Doesn’t matter what you like.” Hyde hissed.

“Yes. It does.” Derek replied, glaring at Hyde. 

“God, Hyde.” Jeff sighed. He continued, anyway.

 “You need to repair your body, not add fat. Fat clearly doesn’t stick to you, so it’s just burned fuel-” Helix was getting more uncomfortable, fidgeting. He didn’t want his every move judged. Quietly, Helix took a bite away. “Stayer!” Helix flinched. 

“Don’t yell at him like that.” Derek hissed. Hyde calmed his volume but it was still a voice that commanded to be heard.

“I will make sure to ask Mikel next time, but he’s busy.” Helix mumbled, 

“Speak up.” I will literally start crying, stop it.

“I will make sure to ask Mikel next time.” Helix stated. 

“Fair enough, right, Hyde?” Stefan asked, immediately regretting it.

“Come with me, we will get it now-” 

“No-” Jeff started. 

“Sergeant Hyde!” Helix hissed, deciding to go with anger and not tears. “If I wanted an older man’s negative opinion on every single thing I do, I would dig up my father!” Derek did a spit take with his drink onto a grunt that began cackling at the situation. Helix shoved the pancakes forward, “If you want to screw with me that bad, then just throw them out. You’ve won.” Hyde narrowed his eyes at him. It didn’t seem like he wanted him to starve, just that he wanted him to eat like a bodybuilder. It was a bit of a strange situation. It was such a small thing, why was Hyde so adamant about this? It was a similar feeling to when the Commandant told him he belonged with him. The feeling of nails trying to bite into his life and open him up regardless of how he felt about it.

“Kid’s got a mouth!” One of the grunts called. 

“Isn’t that the kid that jumped onto the Commandant’s shoulder and beat his head in?” Hyde looked at Helix again, narrowing his eyes and looking him up and down. Almost as if he didn’t believe what the grunt just claimed. He didn’t take the plate, he didn’t say anything for long enough. Helix pulled it back and continued to eat, though the texture and taste made him want to spit it out now. 

“I won’t tolerate this.” Hyde rasped over the table at him. Helix didn’t reply, at this point there wasn’t much that he could say without giving him full submission or asking for a fight. He was so sick and tired of having to tuck tail when he shouldn’t have to. 

“Enough, Hyde.” Derek stated, “Please.” Hyde glared at him. 

“You don’t order me-” Derek sat up, getting serious.

“Don’t forget that I’m the first Sergeant. You’re the third. I do command you, Commandant’s words. Enough is enough.” Hyde sat back, a snarl on his face but he bit his tongue for now. 

“So, Helix, where were you born?” Jeff asked, leaning onto the table now. 

“Bowerstone Old Town.” He stated after swallowing. He watched Stefan’s fingers tap Brick’s silverware, and get chased away, only to return. Helix glanced up at them both as Jeff spoke. 

“That place has become beautiful, but it hasn’t been like that long. You must have had a hard upbringing.” Jeff stated. Helix could see right through him. I’m not giving you shit, buddy. And no less in front of Hyde. He watched Brick grin down at Stefan, swatting his hand away again.

“I survived.” He replied. Were Stefan and Brick close like Derek and Mikel were? “Fairfax Gardens?” Helix asked, pulling his attention away from them. 

“Haha, that obvious?” Jeff looked more pleased then he should be. Helix returned a sharp, 

“It’s the accent.” Jeff looked a little off put.

“You have an accent I don’t recognize.” Jeff pried. Still not getting shit, pal. 

“It adds mystery.” The Romani camp with a hint of Auroran. Helix’s eyes flicked to Hyde, and their gazes met. I am not telling you I’m Auroran, nor that I grew up in that loving camp. I’m asking for something that I’m not in the mood to deal with, especially because I don’t know what he truly wants. Helix flicked his eyes over to Brick and Stefan. Stefan was slowly stealing his fork. “Brick?” 

“What can Brick do for Helix?” He smiled at him, slapping his hand onto Stefan’s, and reaching over, squeezing his side. Stefan squawked and looked down at the table with wide, betrayed eyes and tightly shut mouth. His ears were red on the tops. It was kinda cute, so he smiled.

“Is your hammer hilt made out of titanium?” 

“Yes! Brick has broken many hammers. Commandant was nice enough to buy Brick this one so Brick does not break anymore.” Helix flicked through his head how Hammer had shattered her hilt that was originally wood on the first Spire Guard that killed her father. The first person she had ever hit and she destroyed that relic of a hammer. She had been so distraught about it. Then again, she had just gone through Hell so any loss only made the loss of her father worse. They had replaced it with metal and she dented the hell out of it shortly after. From the last time they spoke she had it replaced again. 

“How old are you, Brick?” Helix asked. 

“Brick is…” He counted. Stefan leaned over and whispered an outrageous number and Brick blew in his face to get him to recoil. “29.” He’s 10 years older than Hammer. Hammer has just started harnessing and growing her ability. Maybe if he got out of here and they actually formed a friendship he would buy her a titanium hammer. She would probably eat her monk robes over it. 

“Why are you asking?” Hyde prodded. A small smile crossed Helix’s face that got progressively more aggressive.

“Because the hero of strength is already surpassing him.” Helix looked at him. “I was wondering if I shouldn’t buy her a titanium hammer when she comes to get me.” Hyde looked dubious about it.

“Whoa!” A grunt hummed, “The first is a girl?” 

“I wouldn’t call her a girl, but yes. A woman.” 

“I call your bluff, Stayer.” Hyde hissed. 

“The Commandant has my seal with him, and knows that she speaks with me. Though this is my tower now, it belonged to Garth, the second hero. I know them both well.” 

“And you’re the third.” Jeff tried. “Or so the Commandant thinks.” Helix shrugged. 

“It’s just that I have weapons that I designed. I mean, yes, I am good with them, but I am not… Superhuman.” Well, that wasn’t exactly fair, but he wouldn’t give himself that credit. It wasn’t a birthright, Helix had worked for this.

“You don’t give yourself enough credit.” Derek mumbled, “But yeah, I don’t think you’re a hero either.” Derek glared at Hyde. “But the Commandant gave us our orders. And we are to protect you, and keep you happy. And if we can’t do that, we keep our mouths shut.” Hyde opened his mouth. “Commandant’s. Orders.” He exhaled in a very annoyed way. 

“What do you normally carry?” Stefan asked. 

“My magnum-” 

“That thing is scary.” Derek hissed. Helix smiled a bit. Not because Derek was scared of it, but because he knew Helix’s weaponry better than anyone here. 

“And my shotgun. I have a rifle, and I have a shield, normally. I carry a knife and grenades.” 

“Magnum?” Stefan asked. 

“Shotgun?” Brick asked. 

“Grenades?” Hyde asked. 

“Yeah.” Helix sighed. “My magnum is a fifty caliber-” 

“What?” Jeff gasped. 

“Handgun. It holds eight rounds, semi auto.” Helix thought. “My shotgun is like a blunderbuss, but better. It has a drum clip so it holds 32, 12 gauge rounds. Semi auto or full auto. You don’t want to see what I shoot on full auto, it will just be meat.” Helix sighed at the looks he got. Like he was insane. “And grenades. Derek saw what those can do. Mini explosives.” 

“Tore five of our guys apart like nothing.” Derek stated, shrugging. “Kids stacked. He got away from the Commandant with just grenades and that thing on your wrist.” 

“Oh, yeah. The Pile-bunker. I forgot about that. Just gives a kick to my punch.” 

“So how did the Commandant capture you?” Jeff questioned. Helix felt Derek tense beside him. 

“I was in Old Town when he caught up to me and had me cornered. I was afraid to fire my weapons because I knew people were in their homes. I engaged the Commandant in hand to hand, and I was doing fine. But my magnum was on the ground and to good to resist. I tried for it, and he planted his foot into my side. And I was done.” 

“One hit?” Hyde asked. 

“No offense, but I think he would wipe anyone at this table out with a hit if he wanted to.” Brick nodded, his eyes wide. 

“Sometimes Brick is glad Brick is on Commandant’s side.”

“With proper training-” Hyde tried.

“Training!’ Brick spout out, looking happy again. Hyde looked bored, exhaling slowly. “Helix could learn from all!” Derek looked up, shaking his head.

“Maybe after he heals.” He covered for a thankful Helix. “Unless he wants to learn from Jeff.” 

“Come on now, Derek. I do important work.” Jeff frowned, his eyes saddened with the most fake of sugar. 

“Reading poetry by the river is so important.” Stefan hummed. Jeff rolled his eyes. 

“You do not understand. Reading helps me write my letters and negotiations to other Lords and allies. I learn languages and I learn words that are much stronger than counterparts.” As he waved his hand. “Besides, it attracts the beautiful ladies.” 

“You need more than just your looks to do that?” Helix asked, blushing brightly as Jeff looked at him with sparkling eyes and a bright smile, placing his hand to his chest. 

“Young Helix, I never-”

“Don’t!” Helix sputtered, glaring at the table. Stefan began cackling loudly. 

“Yeah, Helix, I don’t see you liking the posh lover.” 

“Lover.” Hyde hissed, quotes surrounding the words he spit. 

“Hyde, you bruise him just by looking at him. Jealousy is not a good look on you.” Hyde looked annoyed, ready to fire back over something that Helix was pretty sure he didn’t even care about.

“I really wish the Commandant would kick all of you into the river.” He mumbled. Derek snorted, exploding into howling laughter that Stefan and Brick quickly followed. 

“Wish granted.” Helix looked up, watching the Commandant sit down on the far side of Derek. Wow, his lucky day, he guessed.

“How was Bower Lake?” He asked. The Commandant looked down at him, giving a small shrug that didn’t indicate a wonderful time but certainly wasn’t bad. 

“The camp very much appreciated ‘your’ well wishes.” Helix smiled softly. That was… actually a really nice thing that he didn’t have to do. “And yes, I did indeed catch sight of her and Garth together. I simply need a plan and some luck to get them separated. They walked right into what I am going to guess was the heroes guild.” Not great, but at least he didn’t make contact. Now if Helix could only find a way to tell them he knew where they are. And that he knew about them both being there. If Hammer or Garth was out and he let them slip away he might not be ready for both of them being there.

“The first is a female.” Hyde stated, looking at Helix. “Well, I suppose you were telling the truth.” Hyde’s expression relaxed a little. 

“I’m a semi-honest man.” Helix replied, gaining a smirk directed at him from the Commandant. 

“He claims that he is not a hero, Commandant.” Hyde mentioned, glancing at him. “Are you sure you have the right person?” He pointed a finger at Helix, continuing. “Even Derek doesn’t think he is.”

“I am quite sure, but I could be wrong. However, I have plans for Helix regardless. He is to be treated as a hero would be.” Hyde looked like he had something to ask but when the Commandant asked, “Is there something wrong with my desire?”

“No, sir. Nothing.” 

“Good.” He looked over at Jeff who leaned forward, looking all to happy with himself.

“Commandant, Helix thinks that **I** am handsome-” Jeff totted, as Helix blushed.

“You aren’t his type.” Derek hummed. 

“Like you know what his type is.” Jeff hissed. An argument quickly unleashed, which left the Commandant looking to Helix who wasn’t saying anything. Interesting, considering how everyone else was speaking for him. Helix laid half across the table, whispering to the Commandant,

“Hey.” 

“Yes, Helix?” 

“Why is the bee’s hair sticky?” The Commandant looked thoughtful, leaning closer. 

“I have not a clue.” 

“It used a honey-comb.” The Commandant chuckled, catching the attention of the entire table. “What do you wish for?” Everyone tensed, returning to arguing. “What type of dog would a Vampire own?” Helix thought. His eyes snapped wide and he grinned, slapping the table. 

“Bloodhound!” 

“Ah, nicely done, little one.” Helix shot a glare at him for that stupid nickname. He actually liked it, but like hell if anyone would know that. 

“Have you two become friends, or something?” Derek asked. Helix was unsure how to answer, so he just stated, 

“I’m a sucker for good puns. I guess that’s why I like you guys. You’re all a fucking joke.” Stefan exploded into loud laughter. The Commandant shook his head.

“Sometimes you are as sharp as a knife, Helix.” Brick looked pretty sad about it, as Helix quickly ignored everyone else and corrected,

 “Well, not you Brick. You’re great.” Brick snapped right back up, smiling. Hyde huffed loudly, frowning at Helix who smiled nervously at him. 

“Brick tries.” Derek looked fake sad, 

“I can’t help that I like to make people laugh.” Helix giggled, smiling at Derek. 

“Trivia boyyyy.” Derek looked excited. 

“Y'all know that flies take off backwards?” 

“Behind first?” Hyde asked with a haughty tip to his head. Helix couldn’t help it, 

“YEAH, LIKE YOU.” He turned bright red- “I-I-” The Commandant began laughing uncontrollably, it was definitely a full on belly laugh, turning his eyes up and making him snicker like a fox. He whacked the table and made everything jump. Everyone else other than Helix and Hyde followed suit rather hysterically. Helix slowly slid sideways, standing- Brick hit the table and almost sent it flying. Helix began laughing at that.

“Stayer.” Hyde warned. Helix smiled, inching backwards. “Stayer!” Helix redirected, stepping behind Derek and coming to stand right in between him and the Commandant. 

“Yes, sir?” 

“You can’t always bank on other’s protecting you.” He hissed, leaning closer. 

“If someone-” Helix pointed at the Commandant a few times. “Didn’t hit me so hard, I could chuck you into a table and put you in your place.” Hyde sized him up again, 

“You have much to learn before you can take me out, Stayer.” Helix narrowed his eyes. 

“Maybe I do. But I can’t learn if I don’t try, right? I hope you’re ready for when Garret clears me because I’m going to suplex your ass through a table.” Hyde smirked slightly, which seemed to surprise everyone. 

“I might just like you, Stayer.” 

“You won’t when I kick your ass.” Hyde smiled fully now. It made his cold eyes warmer, and stretched his lips into a thin, sharp grin.

“You might be surprised.” Hyde stood. “I will see you worthless fucks later. Have a good day, Commandant.” 

“Of course, Hyde. Thank you.” 

“Stayer.” Helix looked at him. “If you need something _serious_ , come to me.” 

“I hope you get peed on by a toad!” Helix called, smiling and waving. Hyde shook his head, hiding a grin as he vanished. 

“How the fuck did you do that, Helix?” Helix looked down at Derek. 

“I don’t know what the hell it is, but I have a knack for making old, pissy men happy. Same thing with Kartheus. I just have to figure them out. I don’t have him fully figured out yet, but I’m working on it.”

“Kartheus?” Derek questioned. 

“Oh, my… Father. Not biological, but. Father.” 

“What was Helix’s father like?” Brick asked with wonder in his eyes. Helix smiled brightly. 

“Kartheus?” Helix thought, a smile crossed his face as he rocked on his feet a bit. “He was buff as hell, shorter than I am now. He was a knight of-” Helix paused… “Well, he was a knight. He had dark red hair and a long braided beard. He was brutal, and strong, and notorious for his ruthlessness on the battlefield. Everyone thought that was how he was all the time, so they left him alone. It made him bitter.” Helix sighed softly. “So, one day where he was drinking and leaving the pub I ran into him. Literally. Collided right with his armor on his chest.” Helix began giggling. “He went full dad mode so fast his own head spun off.” They all chuckled. “And after that, I just didn’t leave him alone. Then it got to the point where if I didn’t come see him, he would come and make sure I was okay. He taught me a lot. He was a good man and a better dad.” Brick had tiny tears in his eyes. “Why didn’t you stop me?” Helix squeaked. Brick sniffed. 

“Brick loves happy stories.” Helix smiled a little, watching Derek stand. He sighed, grinning. 

“Alright, let’s get you to Garret, then you can do whatever the heck you want to.” Helix nodded. The Commandant stood, as Helix stepped back to let him walk by. He stood there, 

“I wish to have some time with you, Helix. Let us get you to Garret.” They stood there for a solid second. “Ah, yes. Me first.” He walked passed as Helix smiled to Stefan, Brick and Jeff. 

“Brick.” Helix chirped. 

“Helix!” He sang back with a smile. 

“I’m going to bother you later. I want to see how much you can chuck around.” 

“Brick will be happy to show Helix!” He waved a short wave to Jeff and whispered, 

“Behave.” To Stefan. 

“No can do.” 

“I tried.” Helix mumbled, chasing the Commandant and Derek. 

“Easy on the running, beans.” 

“I am tired of being injured.” 

“You’ll regret it once Hyde knows you’re okay. He won’t leave you alone after that.” 

“That’s fine. I’m going to beat every single Sergeant and then.” Helix looked up at the Commandant. “I’m going to duel the Commandant for my freedom.” The Commandant cocked a brow, 

“I do not remember agreeing to this.” 

“You did.” 

“I do not believe so.” 

“I’m an honest man, Commandant.” He chuckled softly. 

“Once I know where you slide into place, I will give you more freedom, but as I said. You belong here.” Helix blushed a tad, looking over at Derek who looked down at him. 

“Alright, beans, I have to get to my men. When I get off shift, I’ll grab Mikel and we can go to the springs. I think it would do us all good.” 

“Am I uninvited?” The Commandant asked, looking rather bored that they were having this conversation in front of him. 

“Boys night, sorry boss.” The Commandant’s eyebrow seemed to twitch, as he lowered it and said in a gruffer voice, 

“Quite.” 

“See ya’ later.” Helix gave him a quick wave, noticing the Commandant didn’t seem to acknowledge Derek leaving. Oh, the jealousy was rolling off his form in waves. He could tell his jaw was tight from the lift in his cheek and he was far more squared then he had been. He had almost been relaxed earlier. His one hand was curled onto his belt and digging in with his nails. Why? He was about to spend time with him now, so there was no need for jealousy. Maybe because he felt Helix gave that time to Derek, and he had to take time? Or was it that he wished to spend time with Derek too, and now he had been rejected? He looked forward, smiling a bit at Garret who stood in front of the ICU tent. 

“Hi, Garret.” He scuttled up to him, ignoring the brooding energy following closely behind him now. 

“Hi, kiddo, how are you feeling?” 

“Achy, but I’m okay. Walking!” He smiled. Garret nodded, his eyes relaxed and filled with relief. A small smile played on his face. 

“It seems that way, which makes me feel a lot better about it all. Come on, I’ll check you over and then you can do whatever you please. You can stay in the tower tonight, too. If you feel up to it. And you can always come to me for meds, or if something feels wrong.” 

“T-Thanks, Garret.” 

“Mhm.” Garret pointed. “You can wait outside, Commandant.” Helix swore he felt the fire get stoked by a forge bellow. The Commandant took a step closer, he could feel his jacket brush his caff. Don’t. Panic. It’s fine. He won’t hurt you. He’s just standing behind you. Just standing. 

“I forget Garret, do you command me or do I command you?” The Commandant retorted sharply. His voice was no longer playful, nor did it hold any of the gentleness he showed Helix, even when he wasn’t in a good mood. 

“It’s for _his_ comfort.” Garret returned, calm as water. The Commandant made a small noise, taking a step back. 

“Very well, I will be here when you are finished, Helix. I suppose I will take my time when I can.” Helix looked back at him, trying his best to not add to the fire. 

“I’ll be right back.” He nodded, crossing his arms- Helix turned and followed Garret. “I’ve never seen him cross his arms.” He hurriedly rasped to him.

“It’s not a good thing when he does. What the hell happened before you got here?” 

“Derek asked me to go with him and Mikel to the hot springs and told the Commandant he couldn’t go. Pissed him right off.” 

“I can see this.” Garret replied, shaking his head. “You have nothing to worry about, he won’t go after you. But anyone else might want to tread carefully until he cools it.” Helix didn’t know what to say to that so he just sighed. “Alright. Off with thine shirt.” Helix giggled, slowly pulling it off. With Garret it felt okay, he didn’t want to see his back so Helix just kept it to a wall, and never had to really worry about it. Besides, he always told Helix what he was going to do or if he was going to touch him. He hoped that he conveyed to Garret how much that meant to him. “Good, it’s not worse. And you’re holding yourself pretty well. Here.” He handed him a few small pills. “Just your everyday pain reliever.” 

“Thanks.” Helix took them, inhaling the whole bottle of water with it. He sighed softly and Garret snickered at him. 

“Has your breathing gotten worse?” He asked, serious again.

“N-no, it’s maybe a hair better, but not worse.” 

“Good. Okay, I think you’re okay for now. Just take it easy and see me if anything feels odd. If you have any dizziness or ill feelings in the springs, get out and come see me.” Helix smiled at him. 

“T-Thanks, Garret.” He gave him a thumbs up as he put back on his shirt and wandered back out. “As clean as a bill of health I can get.” Helix stated, watching the Commandant uncurl his arms and nod. 

“Good. Come.” Helix chased after his coat tails, glancing up at him… 

“Wanna talk about it?” Helix tried with his face scrunched a bit. He expected him to whip around but he simply kept walking forward.  

“There is not much to say. Derek finds me unnecessary after eight years of working together, even though he was complacent in capturing you just as much as anyone else.” It felt like they stepped into a tundra. “But no, I am the only one to be blamed.” 

“I think his thought is you’re the commanding officer, so you are...” Helix struggled to find the right word, but it seemed that the Commandant knew exactly what he was saying. 

“Perhaps I am, but I would never win against all of them. Even then I would like to think that perhaps I would listen if they stood up to me. If they thought what I did was so wrong, then they should have stopped me. I... “ He exhaled. “I suppose in the forest-” He shook his head, seeming to want to keep that to himself. “You were screaming so desperately. Begging for help. And they did nothing. No one did anything, said anything. And now I am being blamed for something that supposedly everyone here in this camp thought was right. Until I did it.” 

“Without saying too much on other peoples account, there is a lot of guilt in this camp over this.” Helix thought about it, pulling pieces of what he thought was Garret when he was drugged. “I don’t think people were ready to deal with this, I think they all expected it to be easy?” Helix asked. 

“I believe you are correct. They all expected the heroes to sit down and have no personality after they were captured.” The Commandant stopped, turning to him. They had reached a tent that was semi-large, and was obviously his without Helix realizing it. “I had not prepped my men for this, because I did not think that I would have _you_.” The Commandant inhaled, and spoke the truth that Helix already knew. “If I had captured Garth, he would not have been able to roam free, not only would I not allow it, but I simply think he would not. I know that he wouldn’t have made the connections that you have made already with the men in three short days, and if he tried he would have failed.” He turned, entering the tent as Helix followed, listening to him talk. “The men did not expect this, nor did I, because I was sure I was going to capture a man that would be sedentary and speak nothing on his feelings. Instead I captured you. I do not know if you realize or not, but you have that ‘effect’ on most people, Helix. Not just Kartheus and Hyde. Most of them cannot actively dislike you-” Helix laughed awkwardly. “Most that I have met. And the ones that do dislike you do so because of petty reasons, such as you are too kind.” The Commandant looked down at him. “You polarize without realizing it. You have many people at odds with me-” 

“I don’t mean it.” Helix rushed out. The Commandant looked surprised, stopping before his desk as he shifted uncomfortably with what he said to Helix, but let him speak. “I don’t mean to torture you, I don’t want anyone’s guilt.” Helix thought for a moment. “I just want people around me to be happy. I want to be happy but that’s hard for me. I’m… difficult, Commandant. I have a hard time being friendly with you because it doesn’t bother me right now. I’m actually happy to talk to you in the moment.” A glimmer of a smile passed on the bigger man’s face. “But once I sit and think, think of what Garth and B-” Helix froze. “Of what people that are ‘suppose’ to matter to me would say. How I would be punished. It scares me and I end up retreating and being nasty to try and make up for **my** guilt.” Helix rubbed his arm, “I don’t want people to feel that. Yeah, I fought like hell, yeah I’m still hurt about it. But I… I hope you know I am not trying to turn your men against you so that you feel ostracized. Trust me, I know they did it too. And if I was going to do it, I would rather kick your ass myself.” 

“You are such a feisty little brat, Helix.” The Commandant taunted, gaining a gasp of disbelief. 

“I can’t wait to grind you into the floor, you… Massive grizzly.” The Commandant rose an eyebrow, smirking. It dropped, and he continued,

 “But, I believe I worded that incorrectly.” Helix must have looked curious, watching him sigh and sit on the desk heavily. He smiled, sitting on the cot and turned his attention to him fully. “It is not that you have them at odds with me. I made my choice. But that your presence… pulls them toward their guilt, and they are looking for an outlet.” Helix smiled softly.

“That’s really kind of you to think that way. It means a lot to me, I feel guilty about just being alive.” Helix laughed awkwardly, regretting that he brought it up once the Commandant asked,  

“You spoke of punishment.” The Commandant watched his face as he winced, looking away. “Garth was never one to physically punish, so I do hope you mean a verbal one.” Helix didn’t say anything. “He… He would not.” The air turned stiflingly cool. It was just as hard to breath when he was forging. 

“Not him.” Helix replied tightly. “Anyway-” It felt like ice collected on his lips as he licked them carefully. He tucked his fingers under his palms to try and keep the cold at bay.

“We are not letting this go, Helix. Who-” Helix fumbled out a random question.

“Can I have a dog?” The Commandant seemed completely thrown off by this. He made a noise that resembled a sharp, ‘Hm?’. The air became tolerable again, the acrid taste of will sat on his tongue as he licked his lips again.

“I… Do not think that is the wisest idea, Helix. I apologize. When we know if you are the third or not we will talk, that way you can have more freedom to do what you need for them.” Helix nodded. “We still-”

“So there is this really fat raccoon-” Helix interrupted. He didn’t want to talk over him, but he really needed him to get the hint. I’m not going to talk about that. Not yet- No. Not ever. You’re not my friend. Stop, Stayer. You need to get your damned head on. Just because you want friends doesn’t mean that these people should be it.

“Helix.” He scolded. Helix turned a gentle pink, embarrassed but he continued softly, 

“Really fat.” Helix whispered. “Like, twenty five, thirty pounds-” 

“Helix.” He tried again.

“Can I have him? Instead of the dog?” The Commandant inhaled, fighting a smile. The air was near normal again, and Helix relaxed a little.

“Helix, you have no idea what type of disease it could have.” Helix made a circle with his hands.

“Fat. Rolly polly.” He shook his head. 

“Absolutely not.” Helix whined, putting his head back. The Commandant really seemed intent on speaking about what Helix let slip, but he also understood very quickly that Helix wasn’t about to speak on it, and didn’t want to. He relaxed a bit more, then nodded. “Apologies, Helix.” 

“It’s fine, I figured it would be that way. Better to ask before I’m wandering around with a thirty pound raccoon though, you know?” 

“Yes, I do very much appreciate that. I think the only one enthused with that would be Brick.” Helix giggled, imagining it grabbing at Jeff and him screaming like a baby. “Helix-” He looked like he was about to talk about something very serious. 

“Commandant.” An officer slid in unannounced, “We have an issue. A bad one.” The Commandant sighed heavily, his nails raking the desk once and leaving scars on the grain. He stood, looking down at Helix. 

“Stay here, I will return in a moment.” It was very tight, definitely a command. Though Helix knew he meant no ill will it brought out the, 

“Yes, sir.” In him. Helix turned his head, watching him stalk after the Officer. He gently tapped his foot on the ground, humming and waiting. What was he doing? He was in the Commandant’s tent, get to it! Helix glanced around, reaching over and searching the desk. There was nothing but ink wells and papers that seemed to be reports on all sorts of different things from costs to disciplinary action. He then turned and carefully fumbled with the chest next to the desk that was further in the tent. He jolted in surprise when the top opened and the seal was sitting right there, glimmering in the light. 

Helix glanced back and placed his hand on top of it. For a long moment, Helix didn’t say anything. He listened to the silence of the seal like radio static. He wanted nothing more than for things to be normal again, and yet there was this pull that maybe he should just let this whole thing sort itself out. That maybe his intervention was setting off things that shouldn’t be happening in this world. Suddenly, a gunshot rang out. “Guys, you need to leave the heroes guild right now.” Helix stated quickly, his decision made to help the people that he had grown up trying to defend. “He knows you are there, he saw you and Hammer go up there last night.”

“Helix!” Hammer called, sounded genuinely excited. “Oh my god, I am so happy you’re okay. I was going mad! Your dad misses you so much.” She paused, softly stating, “He stopped carrying the seal for now.” She seemed to process. “Wait, really? I told you I felt off, Garth!” Helix sat on the fact that Giles missed him so much. It made him crazy, he wanted to speak with him so badly. Out of anyone he was hoping his father would still be carrying the seal. Garth’s voice pulled him out of his little world and he looked at the tent opening, waiting for someone to notice him or for the Commandant to return. It sounded like someone challenged the Commandant, because he could hear swords clanging.

“I did not expect he would be on us that fast. You were the one that was spouting off information when screaming at him, Hammer.” He swore he could hear Hammer inhale sharply.

“Please, stop.” Helix thought, looking out of the tent again. “Did dad hear you and the Commandant argue?” He rushed along

“Yes.” Hammer replied softly. “He didn’t say anything until the Commandant stopped using the seal but he just told me he wasn’t going to carry it if you didn’t have it.” Helix whimpered a bit, my poor father. He just wanted to help me get away from all of this and now he is sitting alone, doing God knows what. I hope he’s not just hiding in the house. I hope… I hope he’s getting out and doing what he has too. 

 “Listen, just get out of there. He doesn’t have a plan yet, but I know he’ll think of one fast. Move it.” 

“Thanks, Helix. Stay healthy for us, I’ll bust you out of there soon!” Hammer called, it seemed like she really believed it. Helix jumped at the sound of fighting getting closer. Why?

“I’m trying.” Helix was about to remove his hand when he heard,

“Helix.” He went rigid. The voice of the person he wanted to talk to least of all. 

“Blade.” He rasped, checking the tent mouth again. He was becoming nervous from more than just Blade.

“I’m sure you’re not telling him a thing, right?” 

“Not a damn thing.” Helix hissed. He couldn’t help but be pissed. How dare you, I wasn’t the one who betrayed you and left you running. You did that to me. 

“Keep it that way.” Helix decided to do something he never had before. He bit down and hissed, venomously. 

“You act like you give me a reason to, Blade.” And he pulled his hand off the seal. He made a face to himself, that face that people make when they know they did something that royally fucked them. But it felt good, really good. It felt empowering to give him the metaphorical middle finger. If anyone deserved it, it was Blade. He shut the chest carefully.  

“Come on, you limp dick!” Helix spun, kicking up dust with his bare feet and glanced outside of the tent. He felt his stomach tank at the sight of a highwayman- How the FUCK did he get in this far? Helix watched in wonder as Hyde dodged the swift sword, kicking up into the guys stomach with a hard front and nailed his jaw with a cross jab. 

“Nothing. You are nothing.” The highwayman hissed, blood rolling down his jaw from where his lip had been busted. Hyde lifted his sword, parrying him and cleaving down into him, as the man crumbled like paper being dropped. Helix jolted as he ducked back, watching a sword slice at him. He retreated into the tent, grasping a shield that was battle damaged and took the sword, struggling with his side. He knocked it to the side, reeling and smashing the edge of the shield to the bandits jaw. He stumbled back, collapsing. Helix surged forward, grasping his pistol from the ground and leaping up, burying his heel into his jaw and knocking him straight to hell. 

“Good job, Stayer.” Helix looked up, exhaling. Hyde stood there, clearly he had been trying to get to the guys back. His beret was gone and his hair was matted to his head with sweat already. Helix was glad that Garret gave him those painkillers. It looked like it was going to be a lifesaver today.  

“W-What happened?” He asked, trying to control his breathing to not hurt himself. 

“I don’t have a fucking clue. Suddenly there were bandits and highwaymen. Going to guess they’ve been watching us and think that we’ve got money, because they’re trying hard. They found a spot when someone wasn’t looking and marched right in.” Helix nodded, looking down into the gun. All six bullets. 

“Where to?” Helix asked. 

“Going to behave now, are you?” Hyde asked, looking around. “Stick close to me, Stayer, you got that?” 

“Yes, sir.” 

“Good.” Hyde walked briskly as Helix chased him, keeping an eye on their six. Helix’s head turned, and he snapped back into how he always was with a gun in his hand. Helix took aim, inhaled, exhaled half way and- The gun retorted quick, loud and three concise times. Three bandits dropped from their fight with two grunts. They looked up, eyes wide and grateful. 

“Thanks, kid!” Helix took the fast rounds, reloading and saving the two extra clips. He hated revolvers for this type of fighting. Helix turned, shooting a bandit’s hand off as he swung at Hyde. Hyde cleaved through him, smirking at him. 

“Well, I’ll be damned.” 

“I’m alright.” Helix muttered, 

“Mmhm.” Hyde hummed, as they moved deeper into the camp. “This time, actually stay close.” 

“Sorry.” Helix replied, knowing that right now Hyde was his life line. Helix was doing okay, but if he needed help not being near him would cost him. 

“Don’t apologize, Stayer. You saved two men.” Helix kept it quiet after that, following him closely. Hyde engaged a few more men, with Helix picking off distant ones. Suddenly, a loud,

“Clear!” Echoed through the air. It was Derek. Hyde kicked a dead man off his sword and nodded. 

“Clear!” Hyde barked. 

“I’m clear here!” Stefan cried, followed by Brick, who sounded close to Stefan,

“Is good!” 

“The back entrance is clear!” Jeff called. 

“Clear in the front!” Garret barked. 

“Clear at the mess hall!” Mikel called. 

“At ease!” The Commandant called from somewhere in the center. Helix looked up at Hyde as he walked up to him. 

“I’m impressed, Stayer. You didn’t miss a shot, you kept up and you’re injured. Maybe you _will_ surprise me when you’re better.” Helix blushed, shaking his head. 

“Get out of here, Serg.” Helix hissed. 

“Where is Helix?!” The Commandant barked. Helix whipped his head, turning and calling. 

“Over here!” Helix jumped out of his skin as the Commandant warped a few yards away. Hyde grasped his far shoulder to keep him from falling. 

“At ease, Stayer, the fight is over.” Helix huffed, squirming out of his grip that lingered. 

“Why did you not stay at the tent?” Helix looked up at the Commandant, who seemed to be actually angry at him. Really? This is what you get angry at me for?

“A tent can’t protect me.” Helix snapped. He realized his tone, trying to control the sound, he finished, “I was cornered in the tent. Hyde kept me safe.” He had to remember the Commandant was already in a piss poor mood. If he wanted to get through this interaction nicely, he better play the game. The Commandant looked down at his hands.

“Drop the gun.” Helix sighed, unchambering the bullet and unloading it, dropping it to the ground. “That shield is an _antique_.” He took it from Helix, sharply enough to stumble him. Helix took a sharp step back into Hyde now, rather enjoying the idea of a lingering, kind hand. Any other time he would be talking about how important Helix was, but a fucking shield was better then him.

“I’m sorry, someone swung a sword down at me, and I just grabbed it.” Hyde placed his hand on his shoulder again. 

“Your legs are shaking, Stayer. Let’s get you back to the ICU-” Hyde tried to pry them apart but the Commandant seemed to have other plans.

“I decide where he goes!” He snarled. Helix startled, grasping Hyde’s sword and yanking it free. It fell silent, as Helix grit his teeth, panicking again. This panic never did anything good for him. The sword shook, but it was clear Helix would use it if he got any closer.

“Easy, Stayer. Nice and easy.” Hyde tried, pressing down on his hand. And yet here he was. Ridden with fear and the desire to run. Hyde struggled to get him to drop the sword. Finally, Helix gave the hilt to him. 

“I will have words with you, Hyde. You should have never let him leave my tent.” 

“W-What?” Helix asked, not desiring anyone to suffer for a mistake he made. Weren’t they just talking about this? “It was me, I chose to fight! Hyde didn’t even know that I was supposed to stay, I didn’t tell-” A flash of light brought a shriek of agony as the Commandant lifted his arm and savagely back handed him. Helix spun around from the force, his back facing him. He held his face, shaking as he watched blood drip down his wrist. Biting pain radiated down his throat and up to his temple, heat rushing through his hand covering the mark. He could feel exactly where his hand connected. He hit him hard enough to make him dizzy and his ears were ringing loudly. He barely heard Jeff cry out, something like, 

“Avo, dear lord!” Helix turned just enough to see what everyone was doing, he didn’t want his back fully turned, but...

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!” Derek screamed, dropping down a small cliff and approaching him with obvious intent to do harm. Hyde didn’t intervene, clearly his way of disapproving. He went so far as to even cross his arms and stare at the Commandant who looked at his hand.

“Brick… **Doesn’t** like that.” 

“Christ, are you fucking kidding me, do we not learn around here that hurting the kid doesn’t teach him a damn thing?” Stefan hissed. Come on. Don’t cry. Stop. You hit him too, get over it. Just get over it. He didn’t even flinch when you hit him. Stop making a scene, stop blubbering. He just- He has to get even. That’s all. You’re fine. He won’t do it again now. You’re fine, stop it. A few tears stung the cuts he could feel from the claws. He certainly didn’t hold back. Helix was lucky to be standing. Stop crying, you’re lucky.

“You stupid motherfucker!” Derek barked, grasping the Commandant and mashing a punch into his face. The Commandant seemed to shocked to protect himself from a hard knee to the jaw that he was dragged down into. Derek kicked him down and curb stomped his jaw, “I’LL KILL YOU! I’LL KILL YOU YOU, BASTARD!” He reeled for another stomp. Brick rammed into him, picking him up and holding desperately. 

“Not good!” Brick called, 

“YOU ATTACKED HIM BECAUSE ME DIDN’T YOU!?” Derek screamed, flailing to get away from Brick. “I’m SICK OF YOU! YOU’VE BEEN A WORTHLESS FRIEND AND A FAR WORSE COMMANDER! I’M GOING TO FUCKING MASSACRE YOU!” The Commandant was laying on the ground, breathing. It seemed almost like he was having a panic attack of his own. 

Helix began to wander toward the ICU tent. He didn’t want to pass out in that mess. No need to make any of them worry for than they were. It was fine, couldn’t they see that he was fine? It just hurt for a while, that’s all. It’s good thinking material! He deserved it, he’d learn. He realized that he was panting harshly, that his heart was hammering away. _It’s fine_. He deserved that, he should have just listened and not spoken out of turn. He deserved every bit of that slap and _more,_ he shouldn’t have ever fought back in the beginning anyway. It’s fine. It’s fine. Just stop crying, it will be fine. Helix’s back slid down a rough tree that he managed to get to, tucked away from those that were still barking and arguing. His back didn’t even register as he held his cheek, trying to stop the blood flow. Such sharp nails really made a difficult to shut cut, but that's okay. Extra time to think. 

“Helix! Dear God, he actually hit you-” Garret knelt in front of him. He didn’t seem to know where to start, just looking at Helix he was sure he saw something so pathetic that it should probably be put down, not healed.

“I-It’s f-f-fine.” Helix stuttered out, shivering and shaking harshly. Once he was struck issues that Helix didn't suffer from rapidly surfaced. But it was fine, they surfaced, he learned, they went away again. He just needed a little time. “I-I d-dese-deserved it.” 

“No, you-” 

“S-S-spoke ou-out of t-turn. I-I h-hit him t-too, r-remember?” Helix was rubbing his pant leg now, trying to calm himself down. His hand shook so harshly it jumped up and down. “I-I’m n-not ev-even hu-hurt. I-I just n-need t-to th-think a-about w-what I’ve d-done.” Helix nodded. “J-Just… n-need so-some time.”  

“Christ.” Garret rasped, petting his hair once. “Helix, you didn’t do anything wrong.” He urged him up, “Come on. Come, come. You’re bleeding.” Helix slowly followed him, step by step. He looked down as his foot hit something heavy. He had kicked a gun into spinning around. Slowly, it stopped with the muzzle pointing at his feet. His shuttering increased, as so many voices in his head began howling in his head. Just like down where Derek and the other Sergeants were still, arguing and throwing blame where there was none. It was all standing right here. Helix sunk to his knees, Garret was ahead, trying to forge a path for him to walk easier by scattering bodies to the side. He picked up the gun, looking it over slowly. Useless, such a waste of resources. A waste of the Commandant’s energy. A waste of everyone’s energy. Why do you have to be like this? Why can’t you just LEARN? The bandit never cared about a gun like Helix did. Maybe the only thing he could do right. Maybe. It’s alright, the loudest desire took control of him. His hand jammed the gun under his jaw, angled just right toward the back of his head. He had shoved it so hard against his throat he wheezed softly. Bliss. His eyes slid shut and he relaxed slowly, still shuttering, but it felt so good to finally act on such a selfish desire. The ultimate sin for him, something **all** for himself. He sat with it only for a second, before his finger slipped onto the trigger. Gods, just get it over with, I want it so bad! Give it to me!

Just like Adam had taught him, breath in- 

“NO! NO!” Garret screamed, it sounded so desperate, and pained. He could hear him struggling to run fast enough back toward Helix. Another, smaller voice whispered how _good_ it was to have someone beg him to stay like that. He thought that maybe only Giles would do that, too. But in the end, he wasn’t going to stop. The wheels in motion, the pleasure and the promise of ending this facade of a life- Pure decadence. I don’t have to fail anyone ever again.

Exhale half way, squeeze the trigger, never pull. And Helix did, squeezing the trigger gently, as a fanatic scream made his ears ring. 

 _Click_. **Crack.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Something to think about, huh? Commandant you need to work on that emotion regulation. I felt like I was making him seem to appealing, 'perfect?' Gotta throw in a curve ball(or left hook in this case lmao) in somewhere. Also, my dad calls them speed rounds, but it's when a revolvers bullets are on a clip so you can load the gun quickly. I dunno if it's just him or if its a known thing lol. I hope that Helix's thoughts land and make sense and make you all feel real uncomfortable, I tried to make it... Very real. Also, I don't know about you, but that's how I stutter, so I hope that feels super real, too. Thanks for reading! Don't worry, more lighthearted bullshit to come. It comes and goes in waves, this is no easy situation.


End file.
